Never mind the quality, feel the width

 To the Coronet Theatre last night, for The Lodger. I didn't like the play at all (though Iniki Mariano is one to watch), but boy did I like the building and the decor.

Our candlelit bar is one of the most atmospheric theatre bars you’ll visit

Tru Dat. Also the piano's in tune. I gave the clientele a jazz-inflected version of my own composition "While there's a spotlight." No one noticed.

Ruination of the Nation's Urination

 There was an hour and ten minutes to kill last night at the Royal Court between curtain down on 'What If If Only,' and curtain up on 'Is God Is.'

I spent it at the bar, adding three more pints of lager to the cheeky one I had taken on board before the first play.

Is God Is runs for AN HOUR AND A HALF without an interval. By the time I got out there was pressure that needed to be relieved.

For all the gender-neutral codification of the toilets, there was still no queue at the one labelled "urinals" and an enormous queue at the one labelled ummmmm .... something-else-I didn't-notice-I-was-in-a-hurry.

Does all this argy-bargy improve the lives of anyone? How about halving the allocation of Gents and doubling the allocation of Ladies while leaving the letters above the doors alone.

That's dislodged something else from my subconscious. There's a story about Churchill and Attlee meeting in the loos in the House of Commons after the war. Churchill took his place some distance away from his old colleague and went about his business.

"That's rather stand-offish considering all we're been through," said Attlee.

"Guilty as charged," replied Winston. "It's just that I've noticed that whenever you see something large and private which is working well you always seem to want to nationalise it."

I'm at that stage in my life

We meet this morning on the cusp of a marathon. I have long had tickets for What If If Only, a new short play by Caryl Churchill at the Royal Court tonight, but got an economically irresistible offer to see Is God Is by Aleshea Harris in the same venue on the same day.  Thursday is The Lodger at the Coronet. That is three plays in about 27 hours. I should be awarded an honorary degree in theatre attendance.

• https://royalcourttheatre.com/whats-on/
• https://www.thecoronettheatre.com/whats-on/the-lodger/

When I was chatting to Mia about this she said "My friend who just graduated it in Is God Is at the Royal Court. I saw him yesterday." She meant she way him socially as she hasn't seen the play yet.

Let's give it up for Ernest Kingsley Jnr https://royalcourttheatre.com/cast/ernest-kingsley-jnr/

Focusrite

I sent Andy a message saying I was thinking of getting a USB/MIDI cable (Icons passim) to help with transcribing music I have composed.

He replied, with what I took to be a photo of his home studio, saying "Hi Nick, this is what I have, it's a focus rite Scarlet 2i2, a nice simple piece if kit. Also on top is a mac interface (called dodocool) which gives a few more USB B and C slots."

I have had a look at the 2i2 on the manufacturer's website and it doesn't seem to have MIDI. I am very intrigued by being able to play my bass and guitar into it though, and record and process them.

Maybe I would be better off with the 4i4 (https://focusrite.com/en/usb-audio-interface/scarlett/scarlett-4i4)?

I will ask Mr Mulford what he thinks. (Note; also ask him about bundled software.)

'S Wonderful

 I have invented a new game.

As I am sure you know, I reject Gordon Sumner "and all his works and all his empty promises." 

I am sure we all have our least favourite stanza from his oeuvre, but what really pushed me over the edge was:

Don't think me unkind
Words are hard to find
They're only cheques I've left unsigned
From the banks of chaos in my mind

With the best will in the world, what the friggin' hell is that supposed to mean? "Sting, where is thy death?" forces its way irresistibly to mind. 

Here is the challenge. Name a song you genuinely love, but you would hate if he had written it.

I will open the betting with George and Ira Gershwin's 1920's classic:

'S wonderful
'S marvelous
You should care for me
'S awfully nice
'S paradise
'S what I love to see
You've made my life so glamorous
You can't blame me for feeling amorous

Genius, yet if written by Sting ...... RUBBISH!

Your move.

emasculinity

All women know they are prey – and that no one with any authority seems to care

Marina Hyde

Back on my soap box:

When I did my jury service seven years ago it was a case involving a prowler assaulting a series of girls and women on a Friday evening just up the road from here; Tooting IN BROAD DAYLIGHT!

Of all the people who saw the incidents, the only two men with enough cojones to confront the circumstances directly were a Brazilian and a Pole. All the Brits "passed by on the other side." If those two immigrants, both of whom needed translators in court, hadn't been there things would have been far, far worse. I take my hat off to them. There should have been a scheme that doled them out gongs and cash and leave to remain here as long as they like.

Is emasculinity a word? It bleedin' ought to be. We should confront, and our sons should be brought up to confront, predators immediately and directly. Wouldn't cure the problem entirely granted, but it would diminish it immeasurably.

(Now I come to think of it, I should be very proud that Frankie trusted me enough to drive her daughter and her two grand children home in the pouring rain yesterday.)

SuperBlue

 

 SuperBlue the album we saw Kurt Elling promoting at Ronnie's a fortnight ago is streaming on Spotify (and Amazon) now. I thought it wasn't out until the eighth but that is just the physical version. It is difficult to see how artists can make any money at all out of recording these days.

A perfect storm

 My brother John tipped me the wink earlier this week that petrol stations are being resupplied in the wee small hours of the morning to prevent the mere sight of a tanker precipitating grid lock and, based on this advice, I managed to fill up at the Colliers Wood Tesco at around seven this morning. My engine was running on fumes. I myself can largely function without the car, but I have to drive to Hammersmith every Sunday morning to take a man in his ninth decade, who lives alone, out for his weekly grocery shop and that trip was looking less and less likely for this weekend until this morning.

The High Street around the tube station is a perfect storm of incompetence and virtue-signal grandstanding by TFL and the council. At the best of times there is only one lane in each direction because of the cordoning off of the bike lanes and the projection of the bus stop into the road. This morning this was exacerbated by a broken down bus stuck against the curb with its hazard lights flashing. It was difficult to move in the congestion.

"Hard luck," you may think. Bear in mind though that St George's hospital is just up the road from us and ambulances need to charge up and down the A24 (of which our High Street is a section) to and from its A&E department.  At the best of times all these traffic calming measures make it all but impossible to pull over and get out of the way. Ben, with his gift for understatement and months ago, described the experience of blocking a siren-blaring ambulance with some poor patient inside and absolutely no option for letting it past as "embarrassing." Quite. Queues at petrol stations have made the situation much, much worse.

Sadiq Khan, London's mayor and former MP for Tooting, ought to know about St George's but unfortunately he is a self-satisfied narcissist. Do you remember his ludicrous "I need 24-hour security because of my skin colour and the god I worship" assertion at the Labour party conference earlier this week?

First of all I can imagine Allah the Most Merciful looking down and announcing, "don't try pinning any of this on me Sadiq. I think we will find it was you who was asleep at the wheel."

As regards skin colour there was a guy with the same complexion as our Great Leader at the petrol station this morning organising the allocation of vehicles to filling slots. He was maximising efficient throughput with a smile on his face that was friendly without ever getting any way near supercilious or condescending. As I was fuelling I noticed that he was subtly arranging things so that vehicles were allocated to pumps on the same side of the car as the petrol cap, all but eliminating that ludicrous thing where you have to stretch the hose over the boot. Ditto avoiding the situation - as far as possible - where a car at one slot blocks access to one in front.

Off the top of my head, I would estimate he was improving performance by about 20%.  If he ever runs for mayor I will vote for him in a shot.

Sacred Geometry

‘Geometry is a universal language. The laws of geometry are infinite and the same, regardless of difference of culture or location. As a result of this unchanging quality it has been considered sacred in different religious traditions due to it reflecting the unchanging world of spirit. The wider cosmos is full of spheres that are moving in circular motions. Together the patterns of movement create spirals of galaxy formations which astronomically reflect similar spirals found in sea shells. The five-foldness of the wild rose reflects the five-foldness of a cosmological phenomenon known as the Venus pentagram. But the same five-foldness is also found in microscopic sea organisms called diatoms.’

Happy birthday Ben. I have also sorted out your Christmas present.

stress response syndrome

What with all that is going on in my life (the Burglar having had something malignant cut out of him, and the Bomber having something malignant I wish could be cut away) I seem to have responded by quitting the booze and retiring at around nine each evening.

When you find me sleeping it off in your garden one morning with no recollection how I got there it will be a sign things are on the up.

Camellias

Mia is Blanche DuBois from A Streetcar Named Desire for her test scene (whatever that is) in Central. There are four people on the same course in her new flat. Saskia is Stella and the two boys are both Stanley Kowalski. They are going to wish they had never been born when I knock on the door as Marlon Brando delivering her bike and mirror.

I mentioned this to Helen when I was picking up some plants to take over to Peter's on Sunday morning and she made a glancing reference to La Dame aux Camélias that went right over my head. I remembered last night that Blanche actually says "Je suis la Dame aux Camellias! Vous êtes Armand!" to Mitch early in the play. That's a good one to be able to pull out of the top of your head at half past eight on a weekend morning.

Prodnose: In La Dame, Marguerite's death is described as an unending agony, during which, abandoned by everyone, she regrets what might have been.

Myself: Exactly what I needed to hear this morning. Thank you very much.

Rose

PG's told me yesterday that his old friend Rose had died. I met her once because I took him round to hers just before Christmas last year to drop off a present. He said he will get a cab to the funeral but asked if I could give him a lift back. I'll be happy to, if the gods of petrol are willing.

There is a photo of her tying Peter's toddler nephew's shoelaces from years and years ago. I haven't seen it but is sounds like an evocative tribute to a good person and long time chum.

a twitch upon the thread?

 I walked down to the Standard yesterday afternoon, intrigued to watch the second half of the football as Brentford were holding Liverpool to a one-one draw and bumped into Pat Fiona, and their youngest coming out of the back gate of St Joseph's. As we stood chatting a friendly looking Asian looking fellow walked past. "Hello, Father" said Pat. It was the parish priest. He is from Goa or Kerala apparently. For the first time in I don't know how long part of me wished I had gone to Saturday six o'clock mass to meet my obligation.

Later, YouTube's recommendation algorithm proposed that I should watch  The State of Catholicism in Ireland w/ Mattie Harte podcast*. Is the world is trying to tell me something?

(*Murder in Mauritius which is references in the interview is here.)

Community

My brother stayed with me for the last two nights. He was out with clients on Friday morning but intended to work in my office towards the end of this afternoon, so he dropped me off there and I left my car at home so he could use my permit to park in the Mills later. When we left this morning I walked down the street to see how much it would cost him to park in Marlborough Road up until 6:30 tonight; it is free afterwards.

John's car is grey. As I walked back I opened the door of a grey car as the ignition started and tried to get in. It wasn't John's car. There was an Indian fella in the driving seat and what I took to be his wife and child in the back. Luckily I knew the guy by sight as he is from the Colliers Wood Tandoori. I gesticulated to John's similar vehicle in front of his and we laughed it off. 

John and I collected a takeaway later and my friend smiled at me through the serving hatch making a thumbs up hitch hiking sign.

I have thought today about how lucky with are to live in a place where almost everyone is at least acquainted with each other. I imagine jumping into the wrong persons car in some areas of London might lead to unpleasant escalations.

Louie Louie

Louis Lynagh keen to keep fairytale rise going at first England training camp, and fair play to him. 

We first came across Master Lynagh in 2015, when Ben's Ruts (horny handed sons of toil who had fought their way up from the lower leagues) beat Richmond U15s at their own ground as way of announcing our arrival in the top tier.

I remember him being pointed out to me from the touchline as the son of a Wallabies legend. Well he wasn't a better full back than the Bomber that day. You may rest assured of that.

I mentioned the game to Ben last night. He remembered so much about it; a rite of passage with the miracle of Silas' last minute winning try,

Prisoners of the Ghostland

 

My brother John is staying Friday night. If we go to the pub straight from work, we are going to need a movie we can watch after that over a take-away from the Colliers Wood Tandoori. One that doesn't tax the old grey matter too much.

Take a bow, Nic Cage.

Grauniard Review

Cult Japanese film-maker Sion Sono (Love Exposure, Suicide Club) never shies away from an opportunity to shock and surprise with lashings of gore, weirdness and lurid, louche lunacy. Nicolas Cage, meanwhile (now practically a cult himself), loves to rage, bellow and glower in offbeat low-budget films, apparently the kookier the better. They’ve teamed up for this beyond-bonkers, cross-cultural bricolage of styles and influences, and the result is predictably excessive, noisy and more than a little exhausting. But mostly in a fun way, as long as you’re not bothered by gratuitous violence, incoherence and a deep streak of silly.

The setting is some kind of future Earth/parallel universe/post-apocalyptic zona – the why and when is not really important – that’s a mashup of neon-streaked Tokyo fleshpot and Mad Max-style wild west dystopia. A warlord called the Governor (Bill Moseley, hamming it up almost as much as Cage) runs a brothel-prison from which one of his favourite “granddaughters”, Bernice (Sofia Boutella, underused), escapes with three other comfort women. So the Governor hauls our nameless hero (Cage), a former bank robber, out of pokey and sends him off to find Bernice. But first he zips the hero up into a leather jumpsuit rigged with tiny bombs that will blow bits of his anatomy up should he try to hurt her, including explosives attached to each testicle.

Thinking out loud

I was moaning to Andy and Ian when we were at Ronnie Scotts' on Saturday about how time consuming it has been for me trying to transcribe my musiic by clicking on a stave with a mouse. They said I ought to be able to link MuseScore up to a MIDI keyboard. 

OK my digital piano is a Kurzweil RG100 that has to be twenty and more years old. Here's the manual and there are MIDI out and MIDI in sockets.

The Fortune Men

The Fortune Men

By: Nadifa Mohamed

Narrated by: Hugh Quarshie

Length: 10 hrs and 32 mins

Unabridged Audiobook

Release date: 27-05-21

Language: English

Publisher: Penguin Audio

   

Shortlisted for the Booker Prize 2021.

The story of a murder, a miscarriage of justice and a man too innocent for his times....

Mahmood Mattan is a fixture in Cardiff's Tiger Bay, 1952, which bustles with Somali and West Indian sailors, Maltese businessmen and Jewish families. He is a father, chancer, petty criminal. He is a smooth talker with rakish charm and an eye for a good game. He is many things, but he is not a murderer.

So when a shopkeeper is brutally killed and all eyes fall on him, Mahmood isn't too worried. Since his Welsh wife Laura kicked him out for racking up debts he has wandered the streets more often, and there are witnesses who allegedly saw him enter the shop that night. But Mahmood has escaped worse scrapes, and he is innocent in this country where justice is served. Love lends him immunity too: the fierce love of Laura, who forgives his gambling in a heartbeat, and his children. It is only in the run-up to the trial, as the prospect of returning home dwindles, that it will dawn on Mahmood that he is in a fight for his life - against conspiracy, prejudice and cruelty - and that the truth may not be enough to save him.

This month's audible book really was a shoe in.

Oh really? No, O'Reilly

I got a message from Rebecca yesterday morning telling me that Ancestry have revised their ethnicity estimates as they do regularly. I have looked at my updated profile and I am now 100% Irish up from 98. https://www.ancestry.co.uk/dna/origins/share/2291dec9-b75e-427d-bf76-0da2e1479c99

I think that I should be able to drink in the Standard free for ever.

Hybrid

 

To Ronnie Scott's with Andy and Ian to see Kurt Elling featuring Charlie Hunter last night. What a great evening!

Charlie Hunter plays hybrid guitar. It is difficult to explain see https://hybrid-guitars.com/. My view of him was slightly obscured so I was absolutely baffled where the bass was coming from as there was only one person with a stringed instrument on stage though I seemed to be hearing bass and guitar.

‘Kamikaze pigeons’ trained to intercept suspicious drones

 American researchers are examining whether the flocking instincts of pigeons can be harnessed to counter armed drones as the rapid development of ‘swarm’ technology prompts warnings that the emerging UAV threat is difficult to contain

Imagine several terrorist drones carrying primed hand grenades buzzing towards a civilian or military target, leaving its defenders with just moments to deploy their state-of-the-art countermeasure. With a furious beating of wings, the precision weapon designed to send the deadly machine crashing to the ground is launched – a squadron of kamikaze pigeons. 

Far-fetched as it may sound, the idea is one of those being explored by American researchers as the defence and security sector scrambles to respond to the extraordinary pace of development in drones – or Unmanned Aerial Vehicles (UAVs) – which is seeing robotic and increasingly capable autonomous aircraft move rapidly from the purview of state militaries into the technological and commercial mainstream. 

The pigeon research, being carried out by an unnamed private US company according to an industry expert, aims to harness the birds’ natural flocking instincts and acute vision to draw them towards the particular sound and motion of a “quadcopter” drone. The birds will be trained to fly at a machine or machines en masse, neutralising an attack on a potential target from an airport to an open-air concert at the cost of their own lives. 

,,,,,,, read on .....

Life is now wierder than anything Beachcomber ever invented.

Read all about it

A books and reading round up today.

The Wimbledon Bookfest Sunset Festival is on and I went to see the Georgia Prtichett event last night. 

My next Audible credit drops in three days time. I see that there is an unabridged version of The Fortune Men available so I will get that: Booker shortlisted and Cardiff set.

A rave review in the Telegraph for First Casualty: The Untold Story of the Battle That Began the War in Afghanistan by Toby Harnden. His Dead Men Risen: The Welsh Guards and the Defining Story of Britain's War in Afghanistan (Icons passim) is one of the definitive books about our experience over there, so his new one goes straight to the top of my reading list.

iPhone? If I'm paying, it is a MyPhone

 

I ordered Ben a new 64GB iPhone SE on the weekend. It arrived on Tuesday and we set it up in the evening. It is just a coincidence that the new model was announced at the same time.

His old handset had disintegrated. It was five years old after all. The contract I was signed up on could have got him a new one three years ago with - to all intents and purposes - nothing extra to pay.

I am writing these words here as a back stop so I don't make the same mistake again.

National Health

Paul had his stoma surgery for suspected bowel cancer on Monday. It took six hours, but he managed to get up for a brief walk yesterday, plus ten minutes on Skype. 

His sister told me that they are waiting to see if the the growth removed had spread into the nearby bowel membrane, which was removed with it.  This will decide whether he will need chemotherapy or not.

Neil, our mutual friend, has had a similar gut operation and is now fully recovered. I think talking to him has been very useful for keeping Paul positive.

HRH Pat Geary

I wasn't there.

If I was there I didn't do it.

If I did do it, it is protected by a non-disclosure agreement.

The papers that were served had a semi-colon rather than a comma on page 298 rendering them invalid.

Actually I am not even here, because I don't exist.

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2021/sep/13/new-york-court-pre-trial-civil-suit-prince-andrew-virginia-giuffre

Dropping a name from the top of a ladder

 When I went round to PG's yesterday he said, "I saw Trevor (Nunn) at the Riverside in the week so I told him you liked his production of Beckett's Happy Days. He says thank you very much and sends his regards."

Phoning it in

 I went round to Morden to see Ben this morning as we hadn't met since we had a pizza with Mia, and his phone is on the blink. Jane was there, back visiting and told me he is re-entangled with Niamh.

I have ordered him a new iPhone that should arrive on Tuesday. I will have to work from home until it turns up as it needs to be signed for.

Small Change

This is where we will be on Wednesday. In the theatre mind you, not in Cardiff. (Mrs Harte is based on my grandfather's sister unless I miss my guess.)

Re-Realignment

Bethany moved into halls yesterday ready to start at Guildhall.  I met her, her mother and my brother at The Jugged Hare, a nostalgic venue for me as we used to pop there for a quick pint after lectures when I was doing my EMBA.

As we were walking around her new stamping grounds I realised that Moorgate tube station as opposed to Barbican will be a better bet next time I visit as it is on the Northern Line with no changes from the 'Wood.

We ate - or rather they did - at a Russian Armenian Restaurant call Erebuni. It was a bit early for me so I just frank Guinness instead.

P.S. I have noticed that the title links from the blog have been a day out lately, because I missed out 30 August. Thus today's link goes to that day. Normal service will be resumed tomorrow.

A Killing in Tiger Bay

 

 On Valentine's Day 1988, a young girl is discovered brutally murdered in Cardiff's docklands. Despite evidence pointing to a lone white male killer a ten month investigation concludes with the arrest of five local black men. What happens next beggars belief.

BBC 9pm tonight. I was in school with John Actie. My friend Sean Burke's novel Deadwater was inspired by the case.

P I G

A truffle-hunting pig has been kidnapped. Her grizzled owner, Rob (Nicolas Cage), abandons a quiet, off-grid life in the woods and sets out on a recovery mission, chauffeured by a yuppie-ish truffle buyer named Amir (Hereditary’s Alex Wolff, dressed in pale blue linen and a flashy Gucci belt). It is soon revealed that Rob is a former superstar chef.

I know that today is supposed to be all about Boris Johnson's legacy baiting proposed £12bn fix for health and social care, but I couldn't let Nic Cage's latest pass by unheralded.

Emma Raducanu

Emma Raducanu was brilliant last night beating Shelby Rogers (who neat the world no 1 in the last round) to reach US Open quarter-finals. Even thought she blew her opponent off the court in the end it was still dramatic stuff as she was 2-0 down and 15-40 adrift in the third game of the first set before it all started coming together. Next time out on the court - tomorrow - she will face Belinda Bencic (the Olympic champion.)

Amazon Prime's exclusive coverage of the US Open may turn out to be a great coup for them in the UK, bit I wish the match had been on a channel where my mother could watch it. 

Emma Raducanu's father is Romanian and her mother is Chinese. The nagging blather we get about race and ethnicity is largely generals fighting the last war.

Here I am, walking Primrose

I don't know why (perhaps because it is good) but The Promise is one of my favourtie singles. Also Ben (who will be 21 at the end of this month asked me (see Icons passim) to buy him Girls Aloud when he was only five.

RIP Sarah Harding. The BBC are implying she is part of the collateral damage from Covid. I wouldn't be at all surprised if that was true.

In March this year, in an extract from her memoir published in the Times, Harding wrote: "In December my doctor told me that the upcoming Christmas would probably be my last."

She said she didn't want an exact prognosis, just "comfort" and to be "pain-free".

Harding also wrote in her autobiography, Hear Me Out, about how she initially put off getting medical advice when she first found lumps under her arm in December 2019.

She eventually saw a doctor who advised her to schedule an MRI scan - but then "coronavirus hit and everything either went into slow motion or stopped altogether", she wrote.

"I was aware that I needed to get this health issue sorted, but with everything that was going on, it was tough."

She said the pain continued getting worse. "One day I woke up realising that I'd been in denial about the whole thing. Yes, there was a lockdown, yes, there was a pandemic, but it was almost as if I'd been using that as an excuse not to face up to the fact that something was very wrong."

Taliban declare China their closest ally

The border between Afghanistan and China as at the end of the Wakhan Corridor, an odd looking thin tendril of land separating Tajikistan from Pakistan. The border itself is only 57 miles long. 

It was established in an agreement between the British and the Russians in 1895, although the Chinese and Afghans did not finally agree on it until 1963. The Chinese side is in Xinjiang where all the Uyghurs are banged up.

This arrangement is so ludicrous that it would be funny if it wasn't so mad and bound to end in tears.

"London Bridge"

The Government and the Palace's preparations for the death of the Queen (codename "London Bridge") have been leaked to the Politico website (here) and are all over the press today.

It includes plans to change the royal family’s website to a black holding page with a short statement confirming the Queen’s death. I knew that already because it was my idea. I guess I can say that now it is no longer a secret.

Eric Clapton at Old Ruts

I stumbled on this article on Facebook the other day. It seems that Eric Clapton played - with John Mayall's Blues Breakers at the venue we now know as the Old Ruts Club.

It is well worth a read.

Mick Clarke, the author, sounds like an interesting fella.

Speak Memory

I had a wonderful time with Mia and Ben in Corleone's the day before yesterday. Girl can eat, though she slim like twig! Respec' due be wha gwan.

Sad story; the original owner's heart went out of the business when his pizza chef was stabbed to death in Tooting. A lovely guy that chef. He would do the trick of forming pizza dough in mid-air so it looked like a frisbee. I remember him throwing them to Nigel (also no longer with us) to Nigel's unbridled delight.

Gimme another break

We, family and friends, had such a wonderful time what with my niece Mia stopping here on her way to Heathrow that I have nothing profound to announce today.

I can't help but think that is in everyone's best interests..

Gimme a break

As we go into the international break, Spurs are sitting pretty at the top of the Premiership with a 100% record and Arsenal are holding up the table, bottom with a 0% record. This situation will remain unchanged until at least 11 September when league fixtures are back.

Andy H - as you can imagine - is not best pleased.

The Realignment

Retired General Dan Bolger, author of Why We Lost: A General’s Inside Account of the Iraq and Afghanistan Wars, joins The Realignment’s season premiere to discuss the rise and fall of America’s post-9/11 military interventions.

YouTube recommended this to me yesterday and I listened to it as I was pottering about and I, in turn am recommending it to you. A critique of the USA's military hubris taking in everything from the fall of Saigon to the current Kabul fiasco is all the more compelling for being delivered by a patriot with unimpeachable credentials.

Oh, did I mention that Why We Lost: A General's Inside Account of the Iraq and Afghanistan Wars was published in 2015? It is not like he is cutting his coat according to his cloth in August 2021.

Find The Realignment wherever you listen to your podcasts: Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast... Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3mZB6me... iHeartRadio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-th... Stitcher: https://www.stitcher.com/podcast/huds... Google: https://podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0...

A case of you

I came to Joni Mitchell comparatively late in life because I cannot friggin' abide Big Yellow Taxi (especially the last twelve seconds and that stupid bleedin' laugh).

I like to think though that if she hadn't written it already I would have come up with "A Case of You" myself eventually.

Just before our love got lost you said,

I am as constant as a northern star

And I said, "Constantly in the darkness,

Where's that at?

If you want me I'll be in the bar."

Every two hours

Here is my schedule for the first part of the Bank Holiday weekend.

8:30 Hot Yoga

10: 30 Weekly Skype video call with Mum and siblings

12:30 Man City v Arsenal down the Standard.

Unimprovable.

not fib for purpose

 Man charged with contaminating supermarket goods

A man has been charged after a police investigation into the contamination of supermarket products in west London.

Leoaai Elghareeb, 37, from Fulham, will appear at Westminster Magistrates' Court on Friday.

The Met Police said he had been charged with contaminating or interfering with goods with intent.

The case relates to incidents at a Sainsbury's Local, Tesco Express and Little Waitrose on Fulham Palace Road, Fulham, on Wednesday evening.

My Sunday morning shopping trip with PG, starts at that very Little Waitrose and also takes in the nearby  Sainsbury's Local (if anything he wants is out of stock in Waitrose) before finishing at the independent grocers opposite.

I'm gonna keep this arrest news under my hat, he can be anxious enough at the best of times. Does that make me a bad person?

Salomé

We went to see Salomé at the Southwark Playhouse last night. Salomé was a bloke and it was terrible. Perhaps I should watch Al Pacino's documentary to try and understand it. Online at Amazon.

According to the programme, the patrons of the Southwark Playhouse are Michael Caine, Peter Gill, Simon Hughes and Andy Serkis. PG kept that quiet!

Gimme Shelter

Ooh, a storm is threatening

My very life today

If I don't get some shelter

Ooh yeah I'm gonna fade away

War, children

It's just a shot away

Charlie Watts has passed. The lyric video above works as a tribute both to him and to the cynically dispossessed, abandoned, encircled prostrated around Kabul's airport.

I've got a a great down-to-earth Charlie W story as well though. A friend, or maybe friend-of-a-friend  I can't remember who it was,  of mine played in Watts' jazz band on tour and said that the great man used to take his cymbals onto the plane as hand luggage because he worried they would be dented if they were thrown into the hold with the rest of the luggage. He didn't have a flunky to do it though he just tucked then under his own armpit.

Class.

Take them to a baddie hospital

It isn't out in the cinemas until September 3rd, but reviews of Shang-Chi And The Legend Of The Ten Rings  have appeared in the UK press and they are all saying good things about it.

I have tweaked the playback of the teaser trailer above to plunge you straight into the maelstrom as our titular hero disposes of two foes simultaneously with a spectacular double kick that looks like doing the splits with intent after leaping six feet in the air.

It spoke to me because Ben used to practice something similar when he was a little boy. One day I asked him why. "In case two burglars come in here together."

"OK, but what will you do after you have kicked them?"

"Put them up in the tree outside and wait for the police to come and take them away to a baddie hospital."

I think our first post-COVID trip to the Wimbledon Odeon followed by Wahaca should be on the cards for early next month.

E10

Ford

E10 is cleared for use in all petrol driven Ford models sold in Europe since 1992 excluding:

• Ford Mondeo 1.8 SCI from 2003 to 2007.This model and Ford models sold before 1992 should continue to use E5.

Personal imports not approved by Ford of Europe are not included in the above statements.

Before I was driving back up the M4 from seeing Mum in Cardiff yesterday, I had never previously heard of E10 petrol.

E10 petrol explained

During summer 2021, the standard (95 octane) petrol grade in Great Britain will become E10. In Northern Ireland, this will happen in early 2022.

The change in fuel applies to petrol only. Diesel fuel will not be changing.

Almost all (95%) petrol-powered vehicles on the road today can use E10 petrol and all cars built since 2011 are compatible.

If your petrol vehicle or equipment is not compatible with E10 fuel, you will still be able to use E5 by purchasing the ‘super’ grade (97+ octane) petrol from most filling stations.

Petrol pumps will clearly label petrol as either E10 or E5.

So now you know.

Whatsisname who was in that Sherman audio thing with Bethany

 Vince got me a programme when he went to see I am McKellen's age-blend Hamlet in Windsor on Thursday, so I will give it to PG today.

I remember praising  Rhys Ifans' Fool in Glenda Jackson's Lear while not quite being able to remember the actor's name. For me, he will now always be "Something Rhys? Rhys something? You know, whatsisname who was in that Sherman audio thing with Bethany.

Carrier Enabled Power Projection (CEPP)

Rainbows on the aft-island! 🚦🌈

This unique light show on the flight deck marks a series of inclusion events held this week as part of Deployment #Pride. @RNCompass @RoyalNavy 📸 pic.twitter.com/d5KJsINiJx

— HMS Queen Elizabeth🇬🇧 (@HMSQNLZ) August 21, 2021

Just in case you were wondering what our much ballyhooed aircraft carrier is up to now.  Not even this government would try and deploy the navy to landlocked Afghanistan ......... would they?

Tom Tugendhat

 

 "Those who have never fought for the colours they fly, should be careful about criticising those who have."

Chirpy Chirpy Cheep Cheep

cutting bell peppers and adding googly eyes is bound to heal your soul a little, give it a try pic.twitter.com/E8DWRY2D8S

— Rob N Roll (@thegallowboob) August 19, 2021

The Middle East’s woes have only just begun.

 Insert your own confession here.

These are the times that try mens' souls

Eleven and a half years after I was asked to help out the Disaster Emergency Committee with their Haiti work (see Icons passim), the country is suffering after another earthquake.

I learned a lot on that campaign. First, how well off we are over here. I remember just getting out of the shower before I set off to the offices. I was toweling myself off, feeling fresh and good when it occurred to me hardly anyone on the island could even aspire to a day revolving around that fragrant and comfortable set point.

DEC comprises ActionAid, Action Against Hunger, British Red Cross, CAFOD, CARE International, Christian Aid, Concern,  Age UK, Islamic Relief, Oxfam, Plan UK, Save the Children, Tearfund  and World Vision.

There is power, efficiency and wisdom in that collegiate structure as opposed to a top-down approach. Age UK knew people with the same specialization in Haiti, ditto  Save the Children. Help was targeted via these networks in a way that simply wouldn't happen with a broad brush (slap dash?) approach.

How long will this separation and this hatred last?

Thursdays are traditionally "poetry night" in the city of Herat when men, women and children gather and recite both ancient and modern poems.

I'm still working through the Arabian Nights at the rate of one night per day. Night 289 finishes with a girl reciting a poem at a dinner party.

How long will this separation and this hatred last 

Until the joy that has passed returns to me again? 

We lived together in the same country; 

In our enjoyment we thought the envious paid no heed. 

But time betrayed us, forcing us to part; 

Leaving our dwellings like a barren waste. 

You censure me; do you want me to be consoled? 

My heart, I see, will not obey your voice.

Abandon blame and leave me with my love. 

For love is not yet emptied from my heart. 

You broke your oath and chose another love, 

But, though you are away, my heart will not forget.

Poignant doesn't begin to cover it, the day after Kabul fell.

My Muse Does All the Work

 

I have been playing around with an app called MuseScore trying to write a lead sheet. Very happy with it so far.

Cyrano, My Love

 

I stumbled across this and can't seem to find a way to see it,  I need to see it.

a bum note

We went to see Bach & Sons last night. The Bridge Theatre is a nice venue that is new to me, but the play itself is an affront to good writing.

UEFA Super Cup

What a start to the season!! Another one🏆💙🔥 pic.twitter.com/xYMbcyNrdw

— Callum Hudson-Odoi (@Calteck10) August 11, 2021

See also Callum Hudson-Odoi hires out Thorpe Park to thank NHS staff and key workers for their efforts during the Covid-19 pandemic.

Sunrise, sunset, Swiftly fly the years

Sunset Trailer 2021 from Wimbledon BookFest on Vimeo.

Anything Goes

October is now sorted out in my pre-book something live each month campaign. August (Thursday actually) is Bach & Co and September is Kurt Elling at Ronnie Scott's.

Any ideas for November?

The March of Time

My brother John's not too far away today interviewing a client so he will visit this evening, we'll go for a drink then a curry and he'll drive back in the morning.

Both my diary and these spindrift pages say the last time this happened was at the beginning of March 2020, all but a year and a half ago. Chalk up (or is it down?) another withering on the vine to the malign COVID blow back.

The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ,

Moves on: nor all thy Piety nor Wit

Shall lure it back to cancel half a Line,

Nor all thy Tears wash out a Word of it.

Gold: Always believe in your soul

 

After the disappointment of the Lions losing the test series to South Africa yesterday, Wales' Lauren Price wining an Olympic boxing gold medal this morning has bucked my spirits up again. Overall the UK finishes the Olympics fourth in the medal table. Not too shabby.

Also Prince William does a fine job interviewing her about her remarkable life story above, by being friendly, modest and unassuming. 

Now is steel 'twixt bowel and bladder interposed

The NHS has sent me a bowel cancer screening test kit. Considering Paul is due an operation for it and Neil has actually I had one, I suppose I had better do it.

It is probably wishful thinking to assume that reading Improved Detection of Elusive Polyps via Machine Learning form the Google AI Blog has covered me already.

BLUE ZUSHI

 

Rebecca sent me this last night as her Charlie is involved in the visuals though not the music. Not really  man's ting cuz, but happy to spread the news. It does my heart good to see it was largely filmed around the tube station

A Stinging Delight

PG bought me A Stinging Delight: A Memoir by David Storey for my birthday. (A hardback mind you!)

I am "creeping like snail, unwillingly to school" though it. Not because it isn't good, it is great. I am almost unendurably moved. A clause in a sentence can send me off into an introspective reverie.

John Patrick Anthony Browne (born 8 March 1933) and David Malcolm Storey (born 13 July 1933) were contemporaries. Perhaps that has something to do with the resonance. 

"I will finish it eventually" is high and sincere praise. Unlikely to appear in the blurb on the back of the paperback though.

Vaxxers

 I woke up this morning to learn from the Today programme that a Barbie of Oxford Covid vaccine designer Dame Sarah Gilbert has been created.

Perhaps by coincidence, my latest Audible book selection is Vaxxers: The Inside Story of the Oxford AstraZeneca Vaccine and the Race Against the Virus by Sarah Gilbert and Catherine Green. So far it is really remarkably good.

It is Mum's 84th birthday today, Who do I talk to about getting a Bernice Browne Barbie doll?

Left on Afghanistan's Plains

BBC

Afghanistan: Street fighting rages as Taliban attack key city

Ferocious fighting is taking place in a major Afghan city, amid fears it could be the first provincial capital to fall to the Taliban.

Lashkar Gah in southern Helmand province is under heavy assault from the militants, despite persistent US and Afghan air strikes.

https://nickbrowne.coraider.com/search?q=helmand will show you what I have written over the years.

Read the heartbreaking Dead Men Risen: The Welsh Guards and the Real Story of Britain's War in Afghanistan about Helmand. What did those boys give their lives for?

John Reid, Secretary of State for Defense, committed 3,300 troops to Helmand province, Afghanistan in January 2006. Speaking to the media Reid said "We would be perfectly happy to leave in three years and without firing one shot because our job is to protect the reconstruction." In the first year about 4 million bullets and 25,000 artillery rounds were fired by the British armed forces.

John Reid is was and ever shall be a sanctimonious prick, as widows and orphans can attest.

Ronan Keating: The Beginning

Rurouni Kenshin: The Beginning has dropped on Netflix so Ben is coming round this evening to watch it with me. Perhaps confusingly for a series of five films "The Beginning" is a prequel.

I can see from my Amazon orders that I bought the first film on December 18th last year, so this has been a seven and a half month saga for the two of us.

I have linked my Fire TV with the Echo that sits below it, so according to Amazon, I should be able to start the movie by announcing "Alexa, play Rorouni Kenshin."

I tried it this morning.

The reply, "playing songs by Ronan Keating, " came back in a flash!

A feature that still needs work, I suggest.

Ronnie's

The Maytals at the Jazz Cafe has been cancelled, so I have had to arrange something else for September. Kurt Elling at Ronnie Scott's on the eighteenth has stepped into the breach.

Andy M is coming. I can remember going with him to see Arturo Sandoval at Ronnie's because his brother Phil was in the support. Andy thinks this was about twenty years ago. I have done some research and I think it is more like thirty five.

Breaks down like this: I know I met Andy in 1985 when we were both working on a project at the . Grangemouth Oil refinery. I am sure about this because I know I was back in London in February 1986 to start my MBA at the City University Business School. 

There's an album Arturo Sandoval — No Problem - Recorded Live At Ronnie Scott's Club released in 1987 but recorded in August 1986. Today is August 2021. I think I must be right about this.

Highbrowne

 Half past eight this morning.

Breathe-in experience, breathe-out poetry  

Have also nicknamed my new (still unboxed) robot vacuum cleaner Muriel.

A message from beyond the grave

 

The Umbrella Academy

The man is genuinely beyond parody even given the high level set at  https://nickbrowne.coraider.com/2010/10/le-parapluie-uncassable.html

Hang Fire Southern Kitchen

Blimey John, we met Shauna of the Hang Fire Southern Kitchen more than six years ago (see Icons passim).

Here's the post I was talking about that explains their decision only to open three days a week until September due to staff shortages.

 

What a long slow death we are dying.

Rant

Commissioner Dame Cressida Dick's announcement (outside the Old Bailey of all places) that "everyone in policing feels betrayed,” by PC Wayne Couzens’ murder of Sarah Everard was tin-eared and ludicrously complacent. Apparently his is a crime that “sickened, angered and devastated” London’s policing community. Poor old put-upon Commissioner and poor old put-upon capital policing community eh. What am I supposed to do, pass a helmet around and take a collection for them?

The stark truth is that until the Met takes responsibility for the fact that this heinous crime was committed by a serving police officer the organisation will not be able to take appropriate action to reduce the chances of it happening again. Cressida Dick's attempt to include the force among the victims of PC Couzens is slippery, crass, solipsistic nonsense.

Ditto the Home Secretary's asinine announcement last week of paltry gestures that will "bring together the incredible work of police officers around the country and create a consistent response to ending these appalling crimes". Verbatim quote; my italics. Just take a moment to savour it. If the work is already incredible what will it be like once it has been improved, supercalifragilisticexpialidocious?

I recommend that the Home Office and the Police themselves stop telling us how marvelously competent and sensitive they are, and let the public work it out for itself.

I am currently prescribing a period of modest and sincere self-reflection for UK law enforcement.

You see a lot doctor, but are you strong enough to be able to point that high-powered perception at yourself or are you afraid to?

Clarice Starling to Hannibal Lecter in The Silence of the Lambs.

Play it, Sam

We went to Sam's Riverside last week for the prix fixe menu. £20 for two courses and £25 for three. I plumped for two; rainbow trout with endive, then onglet steak in an oriental sauce with broccoli. It was yummy in my tummy.

I have never had, or indeed heard of onglet before. Herewith the skinny.

What is onglet?

Onglet is the French name for a cut more commonly known in English as hanger steak. This rather forgotten choice is a flat cut from the diaphragm or lower belly. It is very loosely textured, can have a tendon running through it, weighs about 400g/1lb and is also known as butcher’s steak, because it is said butchers recognised its superior flavour and thus never put it on display but kept it for themselves.

The special attraction of onglet is a big beefy flavour but some people find it rather strong because of overtones of liver and kidney. It is especially good to serve with highly flavoured sauces.

Makes sense.

Ups and Downs

The Lions won yesterday but I have woken this morning to the disappointing news that two-time champion Jade Jones lost in her first match at the Tokyo Olympics to Kimia Alizadeh of the Refugee Olympic Team.

I don't think I have ever heard of the Refugee Olympic Team before, maybe that is because this is the only the second time there has been one. It made its debut at Rio in 2016 - https://olympics.com/ioc/refugee-olympic-team

The 2020 roster is on https://olympics.com/en/topics/ioc-refugee-olympic-team-tokyo-2020

Kimia Alizadeh was originally from Iran.

Jade Jones tomorrow

 Independent

When is the event?

Sunday 25 July, with the first qualification contest starting at 2am BST.

Which round will Jones compete from?

Jade Jones enters the competition from the round of 16, which starts from 2:28am.

Her fight is 3:52am and will be against the winner of the qualification contest.

The quarter-finals start from 6:12am, while the semi-finals are shortly after 8:04 am and repechages from 11am.

Should Jones go the distance once more, the gold medal contest will be at 1:30pm.

With any luck I will have an appointment with BBC1 early tomorrow afternoon.

Grandad, Grandad, You're Lovely

I watched Jade Jones: Fighting for Gold on the BBC iPlayer last night.  I have been a rabid Welsh fan of hers since she won her first Olympic title in 2012. My transition from someone who had never seen taekwondo before to a conspiracy theorist who thought, before she prevailed, that the judges weren't giving her a fair crack of the whip as I watched it on the telly was a miracle to behold.

I am writing this later than usual as I have been on the road all day. A by-product though is that I heard Jessica Ennis-Hill on Desert Island Discs.

I was very struck that for both if these extraordinary athletes, their maternal grandfather was a high influence and driving force.

In Audible

 This month's Audible credit has gone on The Tender Bar: A Memoir by J. R. Moehringer.

At 8 years old, suddenly unable to find The Voice on the radio, J. R. turned in desperation to the bar on the corner, where he found a rousing chorus of new voices. The alphas along the bar - including J. R.'s uncle Charlie, a Humphrey Bogart look-alike; Colt, a Yogi Bear sound-alike; and Joey D, a softhearted brawler - took J. R. to the beach, to ballgames, and, ultimately, into their circle. They taught J. R., tended him, and provided a kind of fathering by committee. Torn between the stirring example of his mother and the lurid romance of the bar, J. R. tried to forge a self somewhere in the center. But when it was time for J. R. to leave home, the bar became an increasingly seductive sanctuary, a place to return and regroup during his picaresque journeys. Time and again the bar offered shelter from failure, rejection, heartbreak - and, eventually, reality. 

I wonder why that spoke to me? (I had never heard of JR Moerhinger until it emerged that he will ghost write Prince Harry's magnum opus due next year.

During the month (when I also bought some more credits to pick up the latest Fry Wodehouse) I also picked up The New Testament: A Translation by David Bentley Hart.

The early Christians' sometimes raw, astonished, and halting prose challenges the idea that the New Testament affirms the kind of people we are. Hart reminds us that they were a company of extremists, radical in their rejection of the values and priorities of society not only at its most degenerate, but often at its most reasonable and decent.

"To live as the New Testament language requires," he writes, "Christians would have to become strangers and sojourners on the earth, to have here no enduring city, to belong to a Kingdom truly not of this world. And we surely cannot do that, can we?"

I wonder why that spoke to me?

Letters from Baghdad

 

I watched this movie on Prime the night before last.  Even if you haven't got Prime you can rent it for 99p. Gertrude Bell's story is remarkable in itself, but the images and footage are also very resonant as we work our way through the Arabian Nights.

When I was round the Hendries' last night, there was a question about Ms Bell on the quiz show playing on the kitchen TV in the background. You may say:

a. That I aced it.

b. That I didn't tell them I had watched a 90 minute documentary about her the day before.

Down By the Riverside

Kenneth Branagh Theatre Company Cancels THE BROWNING VERSION Due to Increasing COVID-19 Absenseshttps://t.co/KnECwcPIQh

— BroadwayWorld UK (@BroadwayWorldUK) July 18, 2021

I guess that was due to go in after "Happy Days" which we saw on Sunday closed. It must be a body blow to the Studios.

Killing time on Sunday, I was waiting in front of a screen that was scrolling through highlights from the Riverside's archive, and discovered that  John Sessions' satirical solo The Life of Napoleon played there in 1987. Thirty four years ago! Blimey, I can remember going to see it as I was working around the corner at Wimpey. I can even recall talking to John Sessions after it in the bar. 

Today's other theatrical revelation is that I know now the name (see Icons passim) of the son of a cousin who went to RADA giving the family a London hat trick of that, Central and Guildhall when you add in my nieces. He is called Bart Lambert.

Spike Lee for President

We saw  Lisa Dwan as Winnie in Happy Days at Riverside Studios yesterday. It was terrific. That is my whole review. I also find that I am very much in favour of Sunday matinees.

Spike Lee commented as follows when he made a mistake at Cannes and announced the winner of the Palme d'Or prematurely,  'I have no excuses, I messed up. I'm a big sports fan. It´s like the guy at the end of the game who misses the free throw.' 

If we had politicians with the cojones to say 'I have no excuses, I messed up" occasionally we would be a lot better off.

05:45

 I pretty much always catch the news on Radio 4 at six in the morning.

On Sundays there is a fifteen minute called Profile (an insight into the character of an influential figure making news headlines) on before it.

Today's was about Mark Cavendish, and I caught maybe the last five minutes of it. 

I had no idea that his achievements at this year's Tour de France came after illness and injury, or that he only secured a place in the team at the absolute last minute.

I might start setting the alarm a quarter of an hour earlier.

a smiple favour

I had to walk Ollie back home from the pub last night. Her arm is in a sling and there was stuff we needed to transport.

When we got there Andy offered me a drink and - it being rude to decline - I accepted.

We watched the start of a film called "A Simple Favour" on BBC. I was rather taken with it so I have added to my Amazon wish list.

I think that she killed both her husband and her missing "friend" but don't tell me if I am right or wrong.

4120Z003

Britons who received an Indian-made version of the AstraZeneca vaccine are being barred from travelling to foreign holiday destinations, according to reports.

 The batches at issue are 4120Z001, 4120Z002 and 4120Z003.

4120Z003 is the one I got.

Jeff Bezos and space will have to wait.

Soul Music

BBC Radio 4's peripatetic series Soul Music reappeared with a new episode yesterday. It tries to marry es the stories of songs  (one per episode) by the creators with testimony from people whose lives they have affected.

The first episode was about Smalltown Boy by Bronski Beat. As a rule I could live without that, but last time I was in Cardiff Phil told me that Mike Ede has got a job this summer as Jimmy Somerville's driver on his tour and - for some reason - I found that juxtaposition very funny.

Coming up next Wednesday morning The Carpenters' We've only just begun is likely to be much more up my street.

I robot

I don't actually own a vacuum. I used to rely on the cleaners but they haven't been here since lockdown started over a year ago. 

I have bitten the bullet today and the Hosome Robot Vacuum Cleaner, Robot Vacuum Cleaner With Mop 1900Pa, Alexa & APP & WiFi, Strong Suction, Slim, Quiet, Smart Self-Charging Robotic Vacuum Cleaner for Hard Floor to Carpet is winging its way to me from Amazon.

when thou doest alms, let not thy left hand know what thy right hand doeth:

 

It is not as if we are world class skin-flints but I still hope that MPs will vote later against the government's cut to the UK's foreign aid budget. Spending on international development was cut from 0.7% of national income to 0.5% in response to increased spending in the pandemic, despite a commitment to spending 0.7% in the party's 2019 election manifesto. Meeting the 0.7% figure was made law in 2015.

About last night

It's rugby gnome, it's rugby gnome
It's rugby, Gareth rugby gnome

Repeat to fade.

Oldboy

 

Sean has recommended a film to me, something he rarely if ever does:

Try to approach Oldbboy without reading anything about it first. One midnight, a few years ago, Film 4 had drifted from one movie to the next without me noticing as I sat doing some editing or a crossword or something. Then I found myself starting to pay attention to what was on screen, and thought 'What the fxck is this?'

I have watched it now (£2.99 to buy or 99p to rent on Amazon) and pass on a similar unadorned, pot-spoiler-free high-five to all of you.

Lord Emsworth and the Girl Friend

P.G. Wodehouse Volume 1: The Jeeves Collection narrated by Stephen Fry is 40 hrs and 37 mins of meaty goodness, and a staple of my Audible library.

The 45 hrs and 27 mins of P. G. Wodehouse Volume 2, The Blandings Collection narrated by Stephen Fry  came out the day before yesterday. This is without a doubt where my monthly credit will go when it comes around on the twentieth.

I do hope that Lord Emsworth and the Girl Friend is in it. I remember it as Dad's very favourite, so even if it strictly wasn't the fact remains emotionally true for me. Here'a a quote from it:

'But why the dooce couldn’t Ern have - er - pinched them for himself? Strong, able-bodied young feller, I mean.’

Lord Emsworth, a member of the old school, did not like this disposition on the part of the modern young man to shirk the dirty work and let the woman pay.

As ever with Wodehouse, a phrase I regularly use "old school" appears though I had forgotten its origin.

(The Folio Society six volume set The Best of Blandings consisting of Summer Lightning, Heavy Weather, Uncle Fred in the Springtime, Full Moon, Pigs Have Wings, and Service with a Smile, remains on my bookshelf. My Wodehouse strategy incluing both belt and braces.)

October

July, August and September now being sorted, I think I will go and see The Beauty Queen of Leenane at the Lyric in Hammersmith in October. 

Rachel O’Riordan, the director,  was appointed Artistic Director and CEO of the Lyric Hammersmith Theatre in February 2019.  Previously, she was the Artistic Director and CEO of Sherman Theatre from February 2014 – February 2019. I wonder if PG or either of my actress nieces know her? Maybe I could even persuade the former to come along?

Get your priorities right

Guardian

Welsh red: ex-postal worker and retired nurse grab gold with a pinot noir

Monmouthshire’s White Castle Vineyard scoops top prize against global rivals in prestigious blind tasting award

First it was English winemakers that had vineyards in traditional wine-making regions such as France looking over their shoulder, now it is Wales, after a “deliciously fresh” pinot noir from Monmouthshire scooped a prestigious wine award.

White Castle Vineyard’s “pinot noir reserve 2018”, a red wine that costs £25.50 a bottle, has become the first Welsh vintage to win a gold medal in the Decanter World Wine Awards (DWWA).

In other news

England fans are 90 minutes away from seeing the men’s national team win a major tournament for the first time in more than half a century after Harry Kane sent the Three Lions to the Euro 2020 final.

After the captain scored the winning goal on the rebound after his extra-time penalty had been saved,60,000 fans in Wembley were sent into delirium along with millions of fans around the country.

Oh, Bach without any doubt. Bach every time for me...

I booked tickets for Simon Russell Beale in Nina Raine's new play Back & Sons directed by Nicholas Hytner at the Bridge Theatre. They are for August 12th. 

Happy Days at the Riverside is already in the bank for July and we have got the Maytals at the Jazz Cafe in September.

One a month is coming back online as the world wakes up again. next stop October.

Great oxymorons of our time: smart motorway

I had the bright idea of driving to Cardiff from Hammersmith on Sunday. Bad move:

The M4 will be closed in both directions over the weekend of 2 July – 5 July 2021 between Junctions 4b (M25 interchange) and 5 (Langley). The closure will start after 8pm Friday 2 July and the motorway will reopen by 6am on Monday 5 July.

There are closures every weekend for a while going forward see M4 junctions 3-12: smart motorway - Highways England

I note though that if I drive from home I go on the M3 and then take the A329(M) that joins the M4 at junction 10. That is beyond the currently announced closure schedule which ony goes as far as junction 9. Rules out the PG-Hammersmith-Cardiff plan for the foreseeable though.

Watch this space

 PG told me yesterday that Uncle Michael and Auntie Philomena's grandson went to RADA. Chalk another drama school up for the family.

Our Food, Our Family

I turned on the telly after our weekly Sype with Mum yesterday and caught an episode of a show called Our Food, Our Family with Michela Chiappa.

It was about a woman called Kemi Nevins. Born in 1962 to Nigerian parents studying medicine in London, at the age of six months Kemi was temporarily fostered by a British family. At the age of six, once her parents had qualified, she was taken back to Lagos. She couldn't settle though and returned to Britain and her foster parents. It was all rather moving, I must try and get to her Pontcanna Cafe next time I am back in Cardiff for a Saturday.

Reading up on the series online, I also realksed I had half watched the first episode (about Welsh Italians) with mum when I was visiting her before COVID. It seems like a lifetime ago.

#TheatricalDynasty

Bethany Mia has been accepted into the BA Honours in Acting acting BA at the Guildhall School of Music & Drama Royal Central School of Speech and Drama. You know, the place where, snigger, Dominic West and Lily James Larry Olivier and "Judo" Dench went. We are all beside ourselves.

See Icons passim.

Pregnant women will give up their seats for me

If you're 60 or over and live in a London borough, you can get free travel on our transport services with an Oyster photocard.

Sweet. If I can find time in my busy schedule to go through the rigmarole of getting a 60+ London Oyster photocard, my trips to and from the Jazz Cafe will be free.

The New Hideaway?

We have got tickets for the Maytals at the Jazz Cafe for early in September. Although the Jazz Cafe is a long way from here, it is just a moment's walk from the Camden Town tube station, and the Northern Line can take me from Colliers Wood to Camden Town in little over half an hour.

Maybe it can take over the role that the Hideaway once played in my life?

Here's waht's on - https://thejazzcafelondon.com/whats-on/