Oliver Reed: Wild Thing

Oliver Reed: Wild Thing, a play by Mike Davis and Rob Crouch returns to the Kings Head Theatre from 10 – 28 January 2017.

This one-man homage to renowned actor Oliver Reed returns following runs at the Edinburgh Festival, a UK Tour and a critically acclaimed London run.

Join legendary hell-raiser Oliver Reed as he shares his incredible life story whilst knocking back a drink or four. Reed’s was a life well lived, hear about the success of Oliver!, boozy adventures with Keith Moon, his boyhood excitement of learning he was a descendant of Peter The Great and those disastrous chat show appearances.

I can get there by taking the Northern Line from home to Angel underground without even needing to change tube lines. It is as if the dice were loaded against Dry January from the start.

Highballs for Breakfast

I fell off the wagon this weekend as regards Dry January. Can I get back on? Dr Strabismus (Whom God Preserve) of Utrecht is pointing me in both directions.

How Wasted Are You? This Wearable Will Tell You: Get Back On

We've all heard plenty about Fitbit and other wristbands that promise to Change Your Life For The Better!, but one new wearable gadget may actually revolutionize the way you drink.

Marketed as "a premium wearable for happy hours, wine tastings, and more," Proof by Milo Sensors is a slim wristband that functions much like all those fitness trackers you keep hearing about, but it doesn't track your motions—it reads alcohol molecules through your skin to tell you how drunk you are.

If You Love Having a Beer in the Shower, This Brew Is for You: Stay Off

We've all had a shower beer. Why? Because it's one of the few pure, unadulterated pleasures in life. And now, a Swedish brewery has created the ultimate shower beer, because it's designed specifically for that very purpose.

PangPang Brewery partnered with creative agency Snask to create the appropriately dubbed Shower Beer, which is "sweet, but strong" and "meant to gulp in three sips while standing the shower."

January, sick and tired, you've been hanging on me.

As my second Dry January kicks off, I would like to weigh less than thirteen stone at the end of it as well as having got my 500m Concept row personal best below one minute fifty seconds.

This means losing two pounds and shaving 0.7 seconds off my time so it is hardly shooting for the moon.

Gin and tonic

G&T

The drink of millions worldwide, but it would not exist had it not been for Edinburgh-born George Cleghorn, an 18th-century doctor who discovered that quinine could cure malaria. The quinine was drunk in tonic water, but it was so bitter that gin was added to make it more palatable. Bottoms up!

Dry January starts tomorrow, but if I contract malaria I am going to release myself from it.

My entire life

Now onEntire Stout 4.5%A rich dark stout with a strong roasted malt flavour and a long, smooth aftertaste. Suitable for vegans.Entire Stout has an ABV of 4.5%
Posted by The Sultan, SW19 on Saturday, 30 January 2016

I had planned to end dry January tomorrow at the U15s Warlingham game, but that has been cancelled. I am very tempted to replace it with a pint of stout this afternoon, since I read the Sultan's public service announcement above in Facebook.

Bacon-Chocolate Shot Glasses

We’ve all been there before, standing at the bar, shot glass in hand, ready to throw the spirit down our gullet, when we’ve thought to ourselves “man this would really be so much better if the shot glass I’m holding was made out of bacon and dipped in chocolate.” Well wish no more, because thanks to food blog Through The Eyes Of My Belly, that dream is now a reality.

Hat tip, Marcus. As the last weekend of Dry January heaves into view I think I am starting to get delirious.

Dry January: Day 13

Hungover Bear and Friends is an ongoing comic by Ali Fitzgerald about animals and feelings. The main character is not an anti-hero, he’s just a bear in a sweater trying to make it all work.

New alcohol guidelines

What you need to know

Men and women should drink no more than 14 units of alcohol a week - the equivalent of six pints of average strength beer or seven glasses of wine - in order to keep their health risks low, new guidelines have recommended.

Summoning all the authority of a man on day nine of dry January, it seems entirely likely to me that I will get through my entire week's allowance after noon on the 31st win, lose or draw to Warlingham.

I do not regard this as a moral fault, but I am at fault when it comes to item 7 of Esquire's How to do a Dry January (Without Losing the Will to Lve):

7 | Don’t bang on about dry January to everyone you meet as if you're training for an ultra-marathon.

It's not such an impressive feat that you need to involve all your friends and tell every stranger you meet. See it more as a personal, private pain that is well within your capabilities and may just help to remind you that you are in full control of your drinking.

Sorry everyone,

Get thee behind me Satan!

Our range of superb malts ready for the mash tun and 1st brew of 'Phoenix', our @WimbledonBrew subtly smoked porter. pic.twitter.com/JUGFf8FDJV

— Wimbledon Brewery (@WimbledonBrew) January 4, 2016

What a thing to read in Dry January! I do love my stouts and porters. I will pop round the corner to pick up some Phoenix come Feb.

Day five and counting: We came second in the quiz last night. I was less effective than usual particularly on the music and film rounds. Perhaps all my years listening to CDs and watching DVDs with refreshment in hand have left my brain better wired to recall them powered by something more potent than lime and soda water.

Always read the small print

Looking at the Old Ruts U15 league fixtures I can see that there is a home game on Sunday January 31 against Warlingham.

If that - as it should be - is played at the club, my Dry January will finish at noon in the bar rather than midnight. Everyone is cordially invited,

On the subject of rugby, Dan Fish played very well and scored a great try as the Blues beat the Scarlets yesterday. The only way I could watch it online was on S4C (Sianel Pedwar Cymru) which is a Welsh language channel. I muted that and put the Radio Wales English language commentary on a different device. The video lagged the audio by about twenty seconds which was initially disconcerting, though I was amazed how quickly I got used to it.

drink refusal self-efficacy

I am giving up booze for January. I'm already over half a day in and there are no withdrawal symptoms to report so far.

I thought I may as well announce it here to bind myself officially and discourage recidivist backsliding.

An early test will be watching the Pro12: Cardiff Blues v Scarlets game at five o'clock. The BBC say it is live on the iPlayer and Dan Fish returns at full-back. Is it possible to watch a game of ruby on the TV without a can of lager in hand? We shall see.

Prodnose: Drinking refusal self-efficacy?

Myself (with some little impatience): One's perceived ability to resist drinking in high-risk situations. It is distinct from alcohol expectancy which deals with assumptions about the effects of drinking alcohol on one's behaviour and mood.

Prodnose (superciliously): The specificity of these constructs to alcohol consumption has been demonstrated, I imagine?

Myself (infuriated): If using 161 first-year psychology students and multiple regression analyses, is anything to go by; yes. This study indicated that alcohol expectancies and drinking refusal self-efficacy were specifically related to quantity of alcohol consumption, but not to caffeine or nicotine intake.

Prodnose (placated): Well that certainly strengthens the theoretical foundations of alcohol expectancy theory.

Myself (like a nightingale with a toothache): Come back to me on the first of February and we'll see.