Sunday, July 24, 2011

Sat Bains

I have fallen into the habit of playing cookery shows in the background on the BBC IPlayer while I am rattling the pots and pans.

Today I came across Sat Bains' chorizo eggs with scallops and coriander salt on Saturday Kitchen as I was conjuring an old-school Irish Stew. (Irish Stew in the name of the law!)

I haven't even tasted his dish yet and I want to have it for brunch every weekend for the rest of my life.

Love at first sight.

Friday, July 22, 2011

The Day Today

I have to run out of the door to Buckingham Palace now, then go to Surrey Police this afternoon, before coming back for AbbeyFest so I have not time to tug on your sleeve today.

Did you know that Surrey Police named their HQ "Mount Browne" after me? Modesty forbids.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Great Technology

Here's the technology problem: you've got a warm, moisture-emitting object that also contains relatively dry components that you need to get from Point A to Point B with their form, heat, and chemical composition intact. Oh, and the top of the object is covered with a sticky, viscous substance. And you need to be able to do it by the millions, so the solution has to be cheap and mass producible.
The Bomber and I tried out http://www.peripizzagrill.co.uk/ at the bottom of the road last night. Who knew there was so much to it?

(None of it seems to be a NASA spin-off, unfortunately on this day of days.)

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

RIP

Uncle Jimmy died last night; a sad day for the family.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Plot Spoiler

The Bomber and I, like everyone else in this quadrant of the galaxy, went to see the latest and last Harry Potter movie over the weekend.

"There was more to Snape than an unchanging costume." Indeed, but - hands up - I did have an inkling.

Monday, July 18, 2011

the beginning of the end

“Let me turn to the reported displeasure of the Prime Minister and the Home Secretary of the relationship with Mr Wallis.
“At the time [I had] no reason for considering the contractual relationship to be a matter of concern.
“Unlike Mr Coulson, Mr Wallis had not resigned from the News of the World or, to the best of my knowledge been in any way associated with the original phone hacking investigation.”
No doubt that Sir Paul Stephenson was unwise to recuperate from an operation with a luxury freebie at Champneys, but he's certainly drawn blood from the PM with the paragraphs above. I am starting to wonder if the whole sorry saga might even bring down the government.

Sunday, July 17, 2011

Judy in Disguise



Les paroles de la chanson Judy In Disguise (With Glasses) de John Fred & His Playboy Band:
Come to me tonight, come to me tonight.
Taking everything in sight, except for the strings to my kite.

Friday, July 15, 2011

Son of Strelka



A guy the States has cut up the 2007 audiobook version of Barack Obama reading Dreams From My Father to create a whole new story.
In it—I will try to limit the spoilers—a demigod is born from a fruit tree, sets about creating the world, and eventually mates with a human woman to produce a son, called Stanley. "I was different, after all," explains the god-child. "A big yellow dog with a baleful howl, the body of a man, with well-defined thoughts." Stanley's journey is marked by armies of singing children, talking creatures with beating wings, wise Buddha, and apocalypses of falling buildings and burning skies.
I just want to hug my knees in delight whenever I think about this.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Piscators


The Bomber pulled his first solo effort out of the Wandle yesterday. Though the picture is gone (see Icons Passim), the WBI time machine can still surprise me with the fact that it is five years ago that he first cast a line with John and family in a pool near The Barn.

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Hide in plain site

“C.I.A. John,” the AP-profiled analyst-of-mystery responsible for tracking Osama bin Laden for more than a decade, has been spotted in a photo posted to the White House’s Flickr account.

Read the whole thing here:
It seems that although the man’s face was cropped out of the famous Situation Room photo, his pale yellow necktie was not. He also appeared to be unusually tall. The White House, as part of an all-out effort to trumpet its signature intelligence triumph, had released a number of photos on that day to media outlets around the world. Mr. Young simply checked the administration’s Flickr feed for shots of a man with the same build and taste in neckwear.

And there he was.

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

The Restaurant Inspector

Series 1 - Episode 6: Mamma Rosa.

The Mills' Italian appeared on a reality makeover show on struggling British restaurants last night. Fernando Peire, the director of London's Ivy restaurant, went undercover to sample the venue, food and service before revealing his identity and offering advice.

I know too many of the people who appeared in the programme to venture an opinion here without taking my life in my hands.

Monday, July 11, 2011

Head in the cloud

I finished Josh Waitzkin's The Art of Learning yesterday. It is an interesting hybrid of memoir and self-help book by someone who has competed at the highest level in two contrasting fields.
Josh Waitzkin knows what it means to be at the top of his game. A public figure since winning his first National Chess Championship at the age of nine, Waitzkin was catapulted into a media whirlwind as a teenager when his father's book Searching for Bobby Fischer was made into a major motion picture. After dominating the scholastic chess world for ten years, Waitzkin expanded his horizons, taking on the martial art Tai Chi Chuan and ultimately earning the title of World Champion. How was he able to reach the pinnacle of two disciplines that on the surface seem so different? "I've come to realize that what I am best at is not Tai Chi, and it is not chess," he says. "What I am best at is the art of learning."
I read a lot of it on my kindle on the Tube as I traveled to and from the West End on Saturday and then finished it on the netbook Sunday morning before I got up; the kindle software conveniently synchronizing how far I had read between the different platforms.

As I was reading I was naturally intrigued by the Searching for Bobby Fischer movie. Searching on Amazon, it wasn't easily available on DVD in the UK, but I could have got it as an ITunes download for £6.99, and think I probably would have if I had some sort of ITunes/TV connection set up, or perhaps if I was reading it on the IPad.

The days of books and DVDs are numbered.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

DEC



I worked with DEC on the Haiti appeal (Icons passim), they are good people. Someone suggested to me yesterday that the BBC's coverage of the drought was pandering. I was disgusted. Pandering of what to whom?

(I'm aware that it is an intransitive verb, I just got carried away.)

Saturday, July 09, 2011

Fings Ain't Wot They Used T'Be

Last night's post AbbeyFest party having degenerated into a spectacularly ill advised impromptu arm wrestling competition, I can hardly raise my coffee to my lips this morning.

None of us is getting any younger: Exhibit A


None of us is getting any younger: Exhibit B



The Expendables 2 can't come soon enough.

Friday, July 08, 2011

Mystic Meg should have seen this coming



Hat tip, "Skinny" O'Brien for the title and the video.

Thursday, July 07, 2011

a terrible miscalculation of scale


It occurs to me that I may have started to harvest my potatoes a little prematurely.

........... They crossed vast reaches of space in a journey lasting thousands of years before reaching their target where they attacked the first planet they encountered, Earth. Due to a terrible miscalculation of scale the entire battle fleet was swallowed by a small dog. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy states that this sort of thing happens all the time.

Wednesday, July 06, 2011

Deal of the Day

After picking up a festival ticket from Kelkoo over the weekend (Icons passim), I got a 10 class Bikram Yoga pass for the new Wimbledon studio at a bargain basement £35 (as opposed to £125) yesterday.

Maybe the daily deal sites are here to stay as mashable suggests.

That said, I am unmoved by today's "Invisible STb Lingual Braces For Upper Or Lower Front Teeth for £995 from Behind Your Smile, Harley Street (£2700 Value)" proposition.

Tuesday, July 05, 2011

Vic & Bob's Afternoon Delights



New sketches from Vic and Bob, online courtesy of Fosters and not a TV channel in sight. It's a new world; slightly rippled with a flat underside.

Monday, July 04, 2011

Monday Morning Blues

Life Hacker: Now you can get away with cruising around Facebook at work, even when your boss is peering over your shoulder. Well, as long as the boss doesn’t look too closely. Even the laziest slacker can look busy in a jiffy with this interactive adaptation of many of Facebook’s functions. Simply go to HardlyWork.in, click “Gimme Dem Spreadsheets,” enter your Facebook credentials, and there’s your Facebook newsfeed, all done up to look exactly like an Excel spreadsheet.

Management Today: Never mind the austerity: UK CEOs are expecting to grow much faster than the economists seem to think.

Sunday, July 03, 2011

The Big Feastival

I took the Bomber and a couple of his mates along to The Big Feastival in Clapham yesterday.

They got in free as under 12s and I had got a £35 ticket for £14 from http://www.kelkoo.co.uk/ which is a price comparison website of which I had never previously heard.

Saturday, July 02, 2011

a shaving from the bench

Myself: So https://developers.facebook.com/tools/explorer/?method=GET&path=680543528 gives me:
{
id: "680543528",
name: "Nick Browne",
first_name: "Nick",
last_name: "Browne",
link: "http://www.facebook.com/AWelshBornIcon",
username: "AWelshBornIcon",
gender: "male",
locale: "en_GB",
type: "user",
}
Prodnose: Why are you telling me?

Myself: It's a conversation starter.

Prodnose: That's a lousy conversation starter.

Myself: Oh, is it? We're conversing. Checkmate.

Friday, July 01, 2011

Time flies

AbbeyFest 2011 starts a week today with jazz on the band stand.

I have been astounded to realize that we are sponsoring it for the fifth consecutive year (Icons passim).

Come along one Friday or other.

Thursday, June 30, 2011

Wandling Free



The Bomber's off school today because of the strike, so he is in the office building a robot arm. We went fishing with Rayburn and his mate last night. It is like a holiday in the middle of the week.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Drop the name, and put your hands in the air

From today, Google is beginning to support authorship markup - a way to connect authors with their content on the web.

Maybe I can finally figure out if it was Irwin Shaw, James Jones, Kurt Vonnegut, Shana Alexander, Joseph Heller, John Knowles, Betty Friedan, Wilfrid Sheed, Willie Morris, George Plimpton, Peter Matthiessen, Bruce Jay Friedman, Bill Styron, Gay Talese, or Norman Mailer who told me what Truman Capote had said about C. Z. Guest, Nedda Logan, Gloria Vanderbilt, Lee Radziwill, Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, Peggy Guggenheim, Slim Keith or “Babe” Paley?

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

primum non nocere

For all my good green intentions (Icons passim) of washing the aphids and ants off my apple tree, I did in fact spread a little ant killer powder around the bottom of the trunk before I went to work.

When I got back there were no ants to be seen and a couple of ladybirds were grazing on the aphids. I reflected for a few moments on the beauty and elegance of the ecosystem and how it was better to work with rather than against nature, before getting out the aphid-killer spray gun that I had picked up at lunchtime and treating the leaves.

One of the ladybirds took off from the tree and landed on the hem of my t-shirt. I noticed it again five minutes later and flicked it off. It landed stone dead on the grass. Perhaps I should have left well alone.

The Boorish Prodnose (tunelessly): But the sun rolling high, through the sapphire sky, keeps great and small on the endless round - (deep breath) - It's the CIRCLE OF LIFE .......

Monday, June 27, 2011

ants and aphids

I planted my apple tree on March 27. See Icons passim, though I didn't blog the specific event I remember it as part of the bucolic interlude.

I've noticed it has been looking rather sorry for itself lately, listing towards the fence with its leaves curled up. When I went to straighten it up with a couple of six foot bamboo poles yesterday I noticed that it was crawling with ants and that the leaves were covered with aphids.

By the miracle of wikigooglisation I discovered that this is ant mutualism:
Some species of ants "farm" aphids, protecting them on the plants they eat, eating the honeydew that the aphids release from the terminations of their alimentary canals. This is a "mutualistic relationship".
These "dairying ants" "milk" the aphids by stroking them with their antennae.
Some farming ant species gather and store the aphid eggs in their nests over the winter. In the spring, the ants carry the newly hatched aphids back to the plants. Some species of dairying ants (such as the European yellow meadow ant, Lasius flavus)[22] manage large "herds" of aphids that feed on roots of plants in the ant colony. Queens that are leaving to start a new colony take an aphid egg to found a new herd of underground aphids in the new colony. These farming ants protect the aphids by fighting off aphid predators.
I actually watched an ant chasing off a fly off a leaf this morning; a fascinating miracle of nature. I still need to massacre the SOBs though. Apparently washing with soapy water may do the trick, so I'll try that first rather than going straight to DEFCON 1.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Go the F*ck to Sleep



Samuel L. Jackson rocks this bedtime story, capturing a hilarious range of emotions as the voice of a father struggling to get his child to sleep. Go the F--k to Sleep is for parents who live in the real world, where a few snoozing kitties and cutesy rhymes don't always send a toddler sailing blissfully off to dreamland.

It really stirs up some ghosts for me, though I remember early mornings as being far, far worse than late nights.

For a limited time you can download Pulp Fiction's Jules wailing take on this rhyme, free of charge and 100% legit here.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Why is in raining in Glastonbury Daddy?

....... the naughty yellow pixies who pull the special, magic Climat-O-Levers which control the weather have been paid by evil capitalists with fat cigars in their mouth and $ signs on their pinstripe suits to make the world’s climate all horrid so that poor, underprivileged and disabled people and endangered creatures suffer – and that the reason we don’t know about it is because the media is run by evil Conservatives who want to keep this truth a secret.
So that's settled.

Friday, June 24, 2011

a trickle of brave finite

Since my birthday, I am the proud owner of an Actifry.

I produced some top notch patatas bravas with it last night. The recipe was my own. I thought it best not to rely on Google's autotranslate:
We can put the sauce in two ways: either mix the mayonnaise with the salsa to take the speck that itch we like it or potatoes once ready we put over the mayonnaise and then a trickle of brave finite, we must be careful not to go with the latter because that brings them itch. And ready a quickie dish and takes us out of a craving for french fries by very few points.
I'm going to try some noodles along the lines of the video below tonight, though I will probably replace the tofu with something edible like chicken.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Savasana

In the same month that I completed my "30 Day Challenge" (Icons passim) it is gratifying to read that the WRU have taken up hot yoga as well.


Perhaps this also explains what Mike Phillips was up to at 3am outside McDonalds in Queen Street?

Downward dog, dolphin variation with hands-on adjustments from his instructors by the look of it.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Happy Birthday to me

Celebrating Age Festival
The Celebrating Age Festival offers all Merton residents over the age of 50 the chance to learn something new and meet new people. It is co-ordinated by Age Concern Merton and funded by Merton Council.
Oh dear.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Raining Champion

It's the summer solstice today. Last night when I set out for the launch party of Bookfest 2011 at the Wimbledon College of Art, it was raining so heavily I had to put my skiing jacket on and get a cab. What a country this is. The weather is trying to wear me out psychologically.

The party coincided with the College's 2011 Undergraduate show which was fantastic. I recommend it - and particularly the theatre stuff - heartily.

Monday, June 20, 2011

the big man joined the band

When the change was made uptown
And the big man joined the band
From the coastline to the city
All the little pretties raise their hands
I'm gonna sit back right easy and laugh
When scooter and the big man bust this city in half
With a tenth avenue freeze-out, tenth avenue freeze-out
I was down in Wales for the weekend, in happenstance media fast mode, so I didn't even realize that Clarence Clemons had passed. Was it really three years ago that we saw the E Street Band at the Emirates (Icons passim)?

Too much perspective.

Friday, June 17, 2011

I'm willing to be overcharged

Prodnose: You despise me, don't you?
Myself: If I gave you any thought I probably would.
Perhaps I'm turning into a caricature Daily Mail reader, but I can't help but raise a quizzical eyebrow when I read an invitation to tender for an 160,000 euro contract to supply official gifts to the European Police College here in dear Old Blighty.


(That 160,000 euros excludes VAT by the way.)

Thursday, June 16, 2011

I heard telephones, opera house, favourite melodies

I heard on the radio this morning that IBM is a hundred years old today. I quit to start our own company in 1996. A lot has changed in the last fifteen years.


Wednesday, June 15, 2011

A psychologist writes

If you hear someone shouting "help, help, please help!" it is often really a cry for help.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

The thrill of it all

Here is the plan for this morning:
8:30 – 9:30: Registration & Solutions Provider Expo (Third Floor, Whittle Room and Benjamin Britten Lounge)
9:30 – 9:45: Welcome Tracy Laxdal, Amazon Web Services (Third Floor, Fleming Room)
9:45 – 10:30: Opening Keynote: “State of the Cloud” Werner Vogels, CTO, Amazon.com (Third Floor, Fleming Room)
10:30 – 11:40: Customer Presentations & Q&A Panel Advanced Innovations, Michael Higgins, Senior Vice President, IT; Forward Internet, Fred George; Canonical, Nick Barcet, Cloud Solutions Architect; News International, Paul Cheesbrough, CIO (Third Floor, Fleming Room)
11:40 – 12:40: Lunch & Solutions Provider Expo (Third Floor, Whittle Room and Benjamin Britten Lounge)
Doesn't seem all that exciting when you put it like that, does it?

Monday, June 13, 2011

Privilege

I thought it was outrageous when John Hemming MP used Parliamentary privilege to out Ryan Giggs as the footballer behind the notorious super injunction.

As much as anything this was because I felt my gorge rising when I heard him on the radio defending his egomaniacal attention seeking as if it was some sort of Gandhian gesture of disobedience in the service of a noble cause. "Cobblers," I remember thinking, if he really wanted to bring the temple down why didn't he name Giggsy outside the House and challenge the injunction directly?

I was reading something in the London Review of Books the other day, that seemed to me to explain the issues more thoroughly. Perhaps because it was written by Stephen Sedley, who was The Rt. Hon. Lord Justice Sedley until he retired recently.

Here we go:
For more than three hundred years the UK’s constitution has functioned remarkably well on the basis of the historic compromise reached in the course of the 17th century. The 1689 Bill of Rights forbade the impeachment or questioning of parliamentary debates and proceedings ‘in any court or place out of Parlyament’. Parliament in return has made it a rule, enforced until now by the speakers of both Houses, that it will not interfere with the decisions of the courts, whether by anticipating their judgments or by attacking them. If Parliament does not like what the courts do, it changes the law. The sovereignty of Parliament as the final source of law and the sovereignty of the courts in interpreting and enforcing the law are the twin pillars on which democracy and the rule of law in the UK rest. It was the courts themselves which, in the 19th century, extended the privilege of Parliament to cover any fair and full report of what was said there even if it was libellous.

When a member of either House, protected by the privilege which prevents his being prosecuted for it, consciously breaks a High Court injunction by naming an individual who has been anonymised by court order, it suggests two possibilities. One is that he does not understand the constitution; the other is that he does and has set out to transgress it. In spite of protests from members of both Houses who understand very well what is at stake, neither speaker appears at present to have taken any steps against the offenders.

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Aussie Diplomacy

An Australian TV presenter tries out an old Buddhist joke (that you've already read here if you've been with me since 2005 -Icons passim) on the Dalai Lama and hilarity ensues.



It seems to me that His Holiness doesn't know what a pizza is, which puts me in mind of his contribution to the Tiger Woods affair. Revealing, in response to a question, that he had never heard of Tiger Woods was probably the only comment I heard that put the whole sorry mess in context.

Having eaten my way around the world, I suggest that it would in fact be on walking into a noodle shop for a thenthuk that the Dalai Lama would ask Mr Ping to make him one with everything.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

Les is More



The playable and recordable Google Les Paul Doodle is to be maintained on its own page.

You can strum the strings with your mouse or play it via the keyboard. It works starting on any of the four banks (Z, A, Q or 1). It is in the key of G I think so a note to keyboard mapping would be:
A - G
S - A
D - B
F - C
G - D
H - E
J -F#
K - G
L - A

Clear as mud? If you press the button where the bottom of the second g in Google would be, you can record your masterpieces and get a URL with which to immortalise each.

Friday, June 10, 2011

An Unexpected Party

If I say that he is a Burglar, a Burglar he is, or will be when the time comes.
I sometimes read the Daily Mail over a sandwich in Virgin Active at lunchtime, so I know it well as a gastric band for the brain.

They stuck the boot into our auction system yesterday with the idiotic:
The bargains that really are a steal: All the tools you need to burgle houses... being sold by the POLICE
Which was eerily reminiscent of the Daily Star's intervention back in May with
CROOKS' KITS FIT THE BILL
It is all a load of nonsense, as the comments point out as well as I could.

It sends us more traffic I suppose which should mean the police get more money, but nothing like the online interest that an article on confused.com did (see Icons passim). Perhaps the tabloids are getting less and less significant?

Thursday, June 09, 2011

Brixton Beach


The Bomber having conceived an enthusiasm for skateboarding, we went along to Stockwell Skatepark yesterday evening.

Wednesday, June 08, 2011

A Twitch upon the Thread

I got an email from Amazon this morning that said:
Are you looking for something in our Biographies store? If so, you might be interested in these items.

* The Seven Storey Mountain
* Apologia Pro Vita Sua
* An Infinity of Little Hours: Five Young Men and Their Trial of Faith in the Western World's Most Austere Monastic Order
* A Thomas Merton Reader
How on earth did they come up with that? Are there Jesuitical algorithms these days? "I caught him, with an unseen hook and an invisible line which is long enough to let him wander to the ends of the world, and still to bring him back with a twitch upon the thread."

Tuesday, June 07, 2011

iCame, iSaw, iConquered

As Michael Corleone has observed:
There are negotiations being made that are going to answer all of your questions and solve all of your problems. That's all I can tell you right now.
Last night, perhaps at the same moment that Steve Jobs was announcing iCloud, I was attempting to set up Home Sharing in iTunes to see how it would play with a PC and an IPad. I got it working eventually which meant I could watch a movie on the IPad by streaming it from the PC but I couldn't seem to copy a film or to get it working IPad to PC. Yesterday may have been a game changer, but - at the coal face - perhaps the promised nirvana is still be some way off.

Jobs is an intriguing character. The commencement address he delivered at Stanford in 2005 is a very moving piece.

I will be interested to read iSteve: The Book of Jobs: The Exclusive Biography when it comes out next year.

Monday, June 06, 2011

dem apples



Apple’s Worldwide Developers Conference begins today with a keynote address from Steve Jobs. What will he announce? Who can tell, but it will be hard to live up to Simon Pierro's heads-up.

Sunday, June 05, 2011

back to the beginning



I took Ben and his mate Halex to see Free Run - The Show in the Udderbelly on the South Bank yesterday.

After it finished the boys were trying out their moved in Jubilee Gardens, which is where they had a lesson in 2008 (Icons passim).

Saturday, June 04, 2011

First as tragedy ...

In some modern societies—and certainly Britain is one of them—satire is prophecy. This makes effective satire difficult because reality so soon catches up with it. Satire is also dangerous and perhaps even irresponsible, for no idea is too absurd, it seems, for our political masters and bureaucratic elite to take seriously and put into practice—at public expense, of course, never their own.

Sometimes reality is far in advance of satire when it comes to absurdity. The results, however, are not always funny. If a satirist had come up with the idea of a violent criminal who had spent time in an asylum being admitted by a university to its doctoral program in “homicide studies,” thereafter turning into a serial killer, that satirist would have been denounced for poor taste. But this is precisely what a British university did recently. A man with a long history of criminal violence became a serial killer while working on a Ph.D. thesis at the University of Bradford, the subject of his thesis being the methods of homicide used in the city during the nineteenth century. He himself used methods more reminiscent of the fourteenth.

... read on .....

Friday, June 03, 2011

Dashed off

Hello. I am hurrying down to West Dean this morning.

Last night I saw Spamalot in Wimbledon, and the day before I went to see Kung Fu Panda 2 in the Odeon.

So now you know.

Thursday, June 02, 2011

Don’t throw up on the carpet. It’s new.

I finished a 30 day challenge at Hot Bikram Yoga's Balham studio yesterday. That's thirty consecutive days of one and a half hours of yoga sessions in a humid room heated to 40 degrees Celsius.

I started it because I had hurt my left elbow in the gym and I wanted to give it a rest from weights. In the first week, I put out my back out rushing Standing Separate Leg Head to Knee Pose. In the second week I got, what I took to be, gout in my left big toe triggered by dehydration and what may euphemistically be described as lifestyle choices (diet and booze). By this time, it was taking me twenty minutes to get out of bed before I could leave for the 6:30am class, and I couldn't hobble over a pedestrian crossing before the light turned red again.

I remember in this semi invalid period watching some other people in the full expression of Standing Separate Leg Stretching Pose. I had no idea we were attempting something that looked so extreme, or indeed that human beings could actually do it.

There is a strange sense in which, if you are committed to doing something every day, there is no rush, and for the last few weeks it has all been on the up. (Apart from one evening where I took a class, ate dinner at 9pm, found that Enter the Dragon was playing at 10pm on the TV, watched it over a wine box, and still took myself off to Balham at six thirty the next morning. That wasn't pretty.)

Then yesterday, as I was looking forward to finishing and chucking it in for a while, I finally got my head turned correctly in triangle pose found myself thinking, "I can probably get the hang of this if I do it forever."

Wednesday, June 01, 2011

Lambs' Testicle Kebab

As I've been scooting up and back to Balham over the last month, I've noticed an Afghan restaurant called Diana in Tooting.

The Burglar and I made it stop 48 of Eat Your Way Around the World in London last night.

We rejected the house specialty lambs' testicle kebab in favour of palao, the national dish, meat and stock added, topped with fried raisins, slivered carrots, pistachios; along with non-testicular kebabs, salad and naan. Very fine it was too.

There are pictures of the Buddhas of Bamiyan, on the wall so I suspect the venue is not a hot bed of the Taliban.

It doesn't seem to have a website, but I found this video from the opening.


Not only Britain has talent.

(I've also realized that I have mothballed the server that used to host the maps that have graced these food posts since 2005. I must resurrect the data.)

Tuesday, May 31, 2011

A tale of two cities

As I wrote on Facebook yesterday:
After examining my conscience, I have decided to abandon my Cardiffian antipathy to Swansea for the afternoon and support them as Welsh flag bearers against Reading in the play-off. The alliance of Sparta and Athens as Greeks in the face of the Persian threat two and a half millennia ago exhibits many similar features.

Traditional hostility to be resumed when Cardiff get promoted, or Swansea get relegated.
So congratulations to the Swans for running out 4-2 winners. I watched it in the pub. One barman had bet on the Swans winning 3-1 (twenty to one odds) and one had backed them to win 3-2 (at 28 to 1 odds). Swansea's fourth goal was not popular in the Colliers Tup.

I think Cardiff are crazy to sack Dave Jones as manager. Two play offs and an FA Cup Final is not failure for City. When I was a boy listening to the football results on the radio, I thought for many years that the club was called Cardiff City Nil. They's come a long way from there.

Monday, May 30, 2011

Content to Wear Stars on Their Brows

David Brooks (see Icons passim) has been unloading again:
I don't think appealing to people as individuals gets you far. Many social problems are caused by insufficient social capital. . . to solve these problems you need to build dense social networks. You have to get beyond treating people as rational machines who respond to the economic incentives.
We went to Rutsfest for the second year in a row yesterday. Andy H, Hugh and the Burglar accompanied me and the Bomber for a day of local music and bumping into all sorts of friends and friends of friends. It is the strange attractor of our very own dense social network.

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Yoda and the Camberwell Carrot



DJ Spooky thinks it comes from reggae, but let's not quibble, the mashup is one of the great gifts of the Big-Bang-Theory generation to the world.


Enjoy.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

Freaks and Geeks

Geek Pride Day is an initiative to promote geek culture, celebrated on 25 May. The date was chosen as to commemorate the release of the first Star Wars film, A New Hope on 25 May 1977, but shares the same day as three other similar fan 'holidays' - Towel Day, for fans of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy trilogy by Douglas Adams, Star Wars Day, and the Glorious 25 May for fans of Terry Pratchett's Discworld.
Three days later the Bomber and I are watching the first series of The Big Bang Theory first thing in the morning in our dressing gowns. It was his idea to get it.

It's all perfectly normal. Geek culture has been going mainstream for a long time now. Inception: Richard Gere's Silver Surfer dialogue in 1983's Breathless. Bazinga!

Friday, May 27, 2011

The parable of the talents

The Bomber and I borrowed the company IPAD from the Burglar last weekend.

Ben spent most of his time playing games, but he also knocked up some phat beats on Garage Band (Icons passim). It was interesting how much of a head start the fact that he used to take drum lessons gave him with that.

Here's what a guitarist can do with the £2.99 app.



Truly we live in an age of miracles.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

To a Louse


O wad some Pow'r the giftie gie us
To see oursels as others see us!
It wad frae mony a blunder free us,
An' foolish notion:
What airs in dress an' gait wad lea'e us,
An' ev'n devotion!

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

£175 from Reiss

Queen and Camilla outshone by first lady's cheerful informality, but Kate wins the transatlantic glamour title.

Those keen to pinpoint exactly how an essential relationship differs from a special one will be tracking Michelle Obama's wardrobe choices closely. The US president's wife has proved herself to have a talent for projecting a style which underscores and illustrates the Obama political message, while also showcasing her own personality.
I absolutely genuinely understand nothing whatsoever in this Guardian>Life & Style>Fashion article.

It seems I am, and will always remain, a simple soul who would prefer spending an afternoon helping Quentin Tarantino rearrange his record collection, to shopping for shoes with Lady GaGa.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

non-deterministic

Philip Witt has come up with a diverting idea for a life-hack:
In theories of computation there are two broad categories of model: deterministic and non-deterministic. Deterministic models make choices based on inputs; a simple example, the input is two and therefore the model moves to state two. The next input would be three, which would then perhaps mean that the model outputs the letter "p" and then stops. On the other hand, a non-deterministic model would make no such choice. The model splits into more than one reality whereby it takes all possible choices simultaneously; that is, steps toward all possible states simultaneously. It continues this until all possible outputs/end states are reached.

In my mind, finding a passion (taking one route) is a lot like the deterministic model; but I would suggest trying the non-deterministic approach. Write down all goals you might like to achieve or simply have to complete, both big and small, from "kick my smoking habit" to "finish my homework" to "write the short film script I have wondering around my brain", and then just go about your day as usual. If everything you could ever possibly want to achieve is in that list, then you are always working towards your goals.
I am 100% in favour of this sort of strategy. If you are ever feeling just a touch blue for example, may I recommend spending a day in which you address everyone you meet as Elvis, that never fails to cheer me up.

For a deeper funk, I prescribe a day of believing in everything by sheer willpower. Going to work in a world where there is gold at the end of the rainbow, and every chance of courtly love, dragons, chivalry, magic, and trolls at lunchtime can never be dull.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Every One a Winner


Seemingly operating on the same timetable and with the same diligence he applies to homework assignments, Ben has finally brought home the certificate awarded for last year's famous cross country win (see Icons passim).

In other sports news, everyone local thrilled to AFC Wimbledon's promotion on the weekend naturally. We listened to the penalty shoot out on the radio as Ben's mate Jonnie - who plays for the club's U10 - side was round the house. It seems that the promotion also makes the youth programme an official FA Academy. According to Jonnie this means that they get to play better teams; according to his folks it means that have to drive further to take him to matches, even though they are actually delighted.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Rapture to Rupture

Britain's eight-year presence in Iraq formally comes to an end today, when the remaining 170 troops depart, spelling the end to one of the most controversial military campaigns ever conducted in recent British history.

Operation Telic, the mission to join the US in removing Saddam Hussein, began in April 2003. In total, 178 UK service personnel and one Ministry of Defence civilian died, with an estimated 100,000 Iraqis killed.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iraq_War
More than 46,000 British military personnel were committed to Operation Telic, costing the country more than £10bn.

Saturday, May 21, 2011

not with a bang

The fact is, we know that the year [of Noah's Flood] was 4990 B.C. Seven thousand years after 4990 B.C. is A.D. 2011. Remember that when we compute the passage of time between an Old Testament event and a New Testament event, we must add the two calendar dates together and subtract 1. We subtract 1 because there is no year 0. Thus, 4,990 + 2,011 = 7,001, and 7,001 – 1 = 7,000 years .....
I'm losing the will to live just reading the calculations for the world ending today.

Certainly there will be a mighty wind, if the word of God is anything to go by…

Friday, May 20, 2011

The Shakespeare Mas

I read this yesterday, and felt it was important I shared the following passage:
I remember during one particularly dreary February in Toronto while I was studying for my Ph.D., locked in the library, I discovered the fascinating way in which the residents of Carriacou in the Grenadines take up Shakespeare. Every year, on Shrove Tuesday, young men, dressed in elaborate Pierrot-style costumes and animal masks topped with crowns of ficus roots, go from crossroads to crossroads, performing passages of Julius Caesar competitively. They call it "The Shakespeare Mas." The game goes like this. One team captain shouts out a challenge to a member of the other team to recite a passage. (For example: "Will you relate to me Mark Anthony's speech over Caesar's dead body?") If the competitor gets through the passage without error, he can ask his opponent to recite another passage.

The contest is watched over by the huge crowds who scrutinize the speeches for mistakes. Players encourage their teammates with shouts of "brave," "tell him," "go on," and "that's right." Anyone who fails to recite the passage correctly or who mixes up the words, earns a beating from his opponents. The whips used for these ceremonies are serious business, made from telephone wires. The government had to intervene in the 1950s when the Shakespeare Mas degenerated into a huge battle between the North and South island contingents, fuelled by women who supplied the combatants with boiling water and stones. Everyone, throughout the proceedings, is hammered on the local overproof rum, Iron Jack.
The Stella Shouting Contest (Icons passim) set the bar pretty high, but this has surely knocked it off its perch.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Just Harried

The Bomber has decided he wants to do athletics rather than cricket this summer, so we went along to the Herne Hill Harriers junior session at Tooting Bec Athletic track last night. I am always astounded at the facilities one can find with a bit of digging.

He did terrifically well as ever, so we shall just see how things turn out. It has got to be good to drill the motor skills of all sorts of sports when you are young.

For me it will always be Fern Hill Harriers:
Now as I was young and easy under the apple boughs
About the lilting house and happy as the grass was green,
The night above the dingle starry,
Time let me hail and climb
Golden in the heydays of his eyes,
And honoured among wagons I was prince of the apple towns
And once below a time I lordly had the trees and leaves
Trail with daisies and barley
Down the rivers of the windfall light.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Peter's Pies

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone.
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.

The platitudes circle, droning, intense
READING IN PLAYOFFS AT CARDIFF'S EXPENSE
Put crépe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.

They were my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song,
I thought that love would last forever: 'I was wrong'

The stars are not wanted now, put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood.
For nothing now can ever come to any good.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

"a debate of general interest"

Mr Justice Eady Cocklecarrot :
  1. During the afternoon of 14 April 2011 I granted a temporary injunction until the return date on 20 April against two defendants, who were News Group Newspapers Ltd and a woman called Imogen Thomas. It had emerged from a telephone conversation between her and one of the solicitors acting on the Claimant's behalf, shortly before the hearing, that she had at some stage engaged the services of Mr Max Clifford as her publicist ............
The the ongoing case of the super injunction, the married premier league footballer and former Big Brother contestant Imogen Thomas appears to be an inexhaustible source of fun, made even more diverting somehow by the fact Ms Thomas is from Gorseinon. (Cowin' 'ell mun, Gorseinon!)

The latest judgement handed down from the august Queen's Bench Division of the Royal Courts of Justice is a masterpiece of comic prose that I can't recommend too highly.

I particularly enjoyed the deadpan understatement of:
She had asked him to provide her with a signed football shirt, which he did, but he told her that he was not prepared to pay her the sum of £50,000.
And the dark Kafkaesque citation:
X and Y v Persons Unknown [2007] 1 FLR 1567

Monday, May 16, 2011

Give him the finger

The nun Wu Jincang asked the Sixth Patriach Huineng, "I have studied the Mahaparinirvana sutra for many years, yet there are many areas I do not quite understand. Please enlighten me."
The patriach responded, "I am illiterate. Please read out the characters to me and perhaps I will be able to explain the meaning."
Said the nun, "You cannot even recognize the characters. How are you able then to understand the meaning?"
"Truth has nothing to do with words. Truth can be likened to the bright moon in the sky. Words, in this case, can be likened to a finger. The finger can point to the moon’s location. However, the finger is not the moon. To look at the moon, it is necessary to gaze beyond the finger.
It really is extraordinary where an exegesis of Bruce Lee can end up taking you.

Which reminds me, when I was in Chinatown with the Bomber and Raybs last week (Icons passim) we naturally ended up in back street shops in search of exotic weaponry.

We couldn't find any shuriken but nunchaku were on display; labelled, to my delight, wind-chimes in, what I took to be, an heroically imaginative preemptive attempt to stave off issues of legality.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

A Message from the Dark Side

"Ban mobile phones and wireless networks in schools, say European leaders," reports the Telegraph this morning in what appears to be a coordinated attempt to brow beat me on the day after the Bomber has acquired his first ever mobile.

"Mobile phones and computers with wireless internet connections pose a risk to human health and should be banned from school," they say.

In an equally absurd development, having most recently thrown my back out in Dandayamana Janushirasana I am looking covetously at electric adjustable stand and sit desks.

Hemingway notwithstanding, there is just no way of making that sound cool.

Saturday, May 14, 2011

frogs croak before a storm

Dostoevsky was in favor of military intervention in the Balkans, Tolstoy opposed to it. The arguments they put forward are surprisingly relevant to our own current wars.

A little background ......

Friday, May 13, 2011

Wha'ppen

Blogger's been down all day. It' s back now but seems to have mislaid whatever it was I wrote yesterday.

Cultural vandalism.

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Existential Star Wars



In all modesty, my impressions of Yoda and Obi-Wan Kenobi (Alex Guinness incarnation) are achievements of glory and majesty. The trouble is that the Bomber is forever insisting I perform them for his mates.

There number of time you can enjoy reciting:
Ready are you? What know you of ready? For eight hundred years have I trained Jedi. My own counsel will I keep on who is to be trained ...

as a performing flea at the behest of pre-teens is limited.

In future I shall console myself with Sartre Wars.

(The above recovered via Google Buzz from the great Blogger meltdown.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

ANUVAHOOD



Raybs is going back to the States for a month or so, so the old family went out to Chinatown to eat last night as a way of seeing him off.

When Ben and I were telling him about the Attack the Block (see Icons passim) he recommended ANUVAHOOD.

I like the trailer, but it seems to have been and gone from the Odeon.
Prodnose: Why you want bloody Fruitella?

Myself: Because Fruitella's a badman sweet! You get me?
Perhaps I should be exploring this Sarf Lahndan Adam Deacon/Noel Clarke sub-genre more thoroughly?

Innit Marcus was telling me (when I bumped into him at Theatre Mark's cabaret event last week) that he is attached to a potential Noel Clarke project in some sort of production capacity? Between ourselves, I wish I'd paid a bit more attention now.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Flash: King of the impossible



The flashmob was secretly planned by Buckingham Palace to mark last night's royal reception which honoured young people in the performing arts, says the Torygraph.


Extraordinary.

Monday, May 09, 2011

Any port in a storm?

I'm reading David Foster Wallace's Infinite Jest on the Kindle at the moment, and trying hard to resist psychoanalysing an author who died young by his own hand.

In the flesh, it's a novel of nearly a thousand pages that includes footnotes. An impractical proposition for a coat pocket when travelling on the tube, but fine on the Kindle. I was also pleased to see that the footnotes work seamlessly on the digital version.

I've discovered that Project Gutenberg supports the Kindle Mobi format as well, though I haven't downloaded anything from it yet, but maybe it is always worth paying for a professional port. I've got a free e-book of Kipling's Kim but it is practically unreadable due to mad stuttering line breaks.

Sunday, May 08, 2011

Boris Bikes


I hired a couple of Boris Bikes in town yesterday while I was out for a drink with the boys, and Bondy and I had a little spin around Covent Garden.

They only have three gears and the brakes seem a bit spongy, but it set me back a mere two quid and it was fun. In summary, I approve. All I have to do now is conceive of some circumstance in which they would actually be of some use to me.

Saturday, May 07, 2011

the thousand natural shocks

It is now a week since the Burnham-On-Sea Rugby Festival. The Bomber only played in the first match as he hurt his shoulder in the second half. He seems fine now, though he has trouble lifting his arm over his head, but at the time it was a heart-in-the-mouth, game-stopped, doctor-summoned, body-not-moving hand ringer after a crunching tackle.

As far as I can tell (I overheard, it's not like it's something we tally officially) the Ruts seem to have come away with a broken ankle, a broken jaw, and a broken leg as well as the usual blood and bruises among the Under 9s, 10s, 11s, 12s and 13s squads.

That is quite an attrition rate for a weekend. I'm very much reminded of Chris wondering over Christmas if kids rugby was getting more dangerous because - as a teacher - he was noticing pupils hobbling round on crutches with injuries reasonably regularly; something he (and I when he pointed it out) couldn't remember happening when we were in school.

The season's over now, so I don't have to worry about it for a few months. In the meantime, break out the Rocky Balboa DVD and keep a box of tissues handy:
Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunshine and rainbows. It's a very mean and nasty place, and I don't care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain't about how hard you hit. It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward; how much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done. Now, if you know what you're worth, then go out and get what you're worth. But you gotta be willing to take the hits, and not pointing fingers saying you ain't where you wanna be because of him, or her, or anybody. Cowards do that and that ain't you. You're better than that! I'm always gonna love you, no matter what. No matter what happens. You're my son, you're my blood. You're the best thing in my life........

Friday, May 06, 2011

I'm not alive. I'm not dead. I'm just so lonely

Under the invaluable Freedom of Information Act, Dyfed Powys Police have revealed that in the last few years:
Officers were twice called to reports of the living dead stalking their largely rural area. They were also asked to investigate 26 ghosts, 20 UFOs, 11 witches and even two vampires.
Darkness falls across the land. The midnight hour is close at hand ........

Thursday, May 05, 2011

Casting is underway

If I ever run for office it will be with the slogan "hang and flog." I will also have manifesto commitments to bring back the press gang and the work house, so it is not a bleeding heart that makes me think there is something very rum about this Obama/Osama business.

What was a photographer supposed to be doing in the Situation Room as the operation unfolded, for example?

That I can just about understand as undignified PR, but when I read in Variety in an article apparently published on the same day as the killing that "Mark Boal's untitled script about the operatives hunting Osama bin Laden centers on the very team that wound up killing the terrorist leader, a lucky break for the filmmaker who now has an ending for the project that's still scheduled to go into production this summer with Kathryn Bigelow directing," even I started to wonder if Jean Baudrillard was right.

Wednesday, May 04, 2011

Rugby Round Up

Keith Richards has been tried on drug-related charges five times: in 1967, twice in 1973, in 1977 and in 1978. The first trial – the only one involving a prison sentence – resulted from a February 1967 police raid on Redlands, Richards' Sussex estate, where he and some friends, including Mick Jagger, were spending the weekend.

Yet in 2010, Peter Hitchens wrote of Richards that he is "a capering streak of living gristle who ought to be exhibited," and Toulon manager Tom Whitford told The Daily Telegraph on Tuesday night that Richards' controversial past would not be held against him if he were to join the club, who on Monday announced that Gavin Henson would see out the remainder of his contract after a suspension for fighting with his team-mates.

“If Keith Richards was ever to join us, he would come with a clean slate,” said Whitford.

Meanwhile Wales No8 Andy Powell is likely to discover today whether he has a future at Wasps following his suspension by the Premiership club for his role in a bar-room brawl.

Tuesday, May 03, 2011

Sometimes I just sits


Who else is old enough to remember TV closing down at the end of the evening with the national anthem? Did the image really used to shrink down to a dot in the middle of the screen and then disappear? That's what I recall, but the chances of it being correct are slim.

Monday, May 02, 2011

Attack the blog

I have just returned from a weekend rugby tournament with the Bomber, of which more later. We took in the new Thor movie when we got back, of which more later, but I fell for the trailer for Attack The Block that was screened before the main feature.



This is too much madness to explain in one text!

Friday, April 29, 2011

You're moving into a land of both shadow and substance

The Royal family has truly embraced the digital age – with impressive results, says Patrick Jephson.
......
Now there’s an extra reason to celebrate: the palace’s big push into social networking to broaden its public appeal seems to be paying off handsomely. Words such as “deft”, “adroit”, and even “masterful” have, in recent weeks, been tossed in the direction of palace press offices more used to dealing with brickbats than bouquets. Suddenly it’s springtime and even the thorniest bushes are in bloom.
Modesty forbids. 100% recycled electrons. A significant day's work dawns, then I'm off to Somerset for the weekend to watch the bomber in a rugby tournament.

Radio silence will be maintained until Monday.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Confusion

This article on the confused.com website sent our auction site 30,000 new visitors over the last couple of days. Yesterday was its busiest day since it was on featured on prime time BBC in 2008 (Icons passim).

I'm astounded. Editorial copy on a price comparison website has generated more traffic than even the great "Bungling Cops Sell Knives on the Internet" controversy that was started in the Sun and picked up by all and sundry in December three years ago.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

the online begetter

It seems that there is a movie version of Big Sur in the works, to go with the forthcoming On the Road film and the been-and-gone Howl, see Icons passim.

And yet Kerouac's Desolation Angels is still out of print and unKindled.

As I brooded on this turn of events while shaving this morning, it struck me out of the blue that I could always ........ borrow it from the library!

That's how I used to get hold of almost every book I read, yet it the 21st century it has taken me five months to come up with this radical plan.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

I love it when a pan comes together

Looking in the fridge and the veg basket last night, I had two chicken thighs, a little German hock, an onion, a red pepper, garlic, some loose coriander and nothing much else. I've got rosemary in the garden as well, so - substituting the parsley with cilantro - Angela Hartnett's pot-roast chicken recipe from the previous day's Telegraph fit the bill exactly.

All I was short of was caraway seeds for the suggested side, but still it was serendipity indeed.

I've got previous with this type of thing, see Icons passim.

(You can't really go wrong with chorizo. I will probably include it as an ingredient if I ever bring out my own line of cosmetics.)

Monday, April 25, 2011

United

I haven't seen last night's BBC drama "United" about the Busby Babes and the Munich air crash yet, though I am sure that the BBC IPlayer will take the strain.

David Tennant plays Jimmy Murphy, Manchester United's assistant manager. He hadn't been at Munich because he was away managing the Welsh team in a World Cup qualifying game, but took over and steered a substitute team to the FA Cup final while Matt Busby recovered from his injuries.

A Welsh Born Icon (born in Ton Pentre, Rhondda), if ever the was one.

My cousin Pat was on Man U's books in the 70s (I am hazy on the precise dates) so he may well have met Murphy, who retired in 1971.

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Kingston Philosophy Café

I am disappointed to have missed Raymond Tallis explains Why Neuroscience Will Never Explain Consciousness last week as I wasn't aware of it until too late.

I'm rather pleased however to have discovered the hitherto unsuspected Kingston Philosophy Café.


Saturday, April 23, 2011

priests without altar wine

On what what would be St George's Day if it wasn't moved when it is so close to Easter, let's swerve across the Channel and celebrate the French.
France's riot police have complained about being "treated like children" following a new ban on drinking alcohol while on duty.
The CRS (Republican Security Companies), which made its name quelling student demonstrators during nationwide disturbances in 1968, has always enjoyed a glass of beer or wine with its meals.
However, following photos of riot police drinking bottles of beer during Paris street protest, police chiefs have decided to put an end to the tradition.
They were wearing body armour and carrying weapons as they sipped from beer and wine bottles. Some were also smoking.
Didier Mangione, national secretary of the police union, said bosses were "trying to turn us into priests, but without the altar wine".
"Nobody should object to a small drink on jobs," he said. "CRS officers do not have any more or less alcohol problems than anybody else in society. They should be allowed to drink in moderation."

Friday, April 22, 2011

No likey


Facebook's Like button is one year old today.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

I'm only dancing



Myself: Dancing?

Prodnose: I'm having so much fun

Myself: Dancing?

Prodnose: Too bad my back has gone

Myself: Dancing?

Prodnose: Boogie down with daddy now. (I'd give my house in the country, if you'd slept it's so funky.)

Myself: Music?

Prodnose: I'm dancing in the street

Myself: Ah, music

Prodnose: I've torn the shoes from my feet

Myself: Romancing?

Prodnose: It's got me dirty and sweet

Myself: It's got you reeling and rocking ....

Prodnose: Won't you let me slam my thing?

Myself: John.....

Prodnose: I'm only dancing

Myself: She turns me on

Prodnose: But I'm only dancing

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Always try to rub up against money

Could 29 April give us the biggest live event the internet has ever seen? I’m talking of course about the Royal Wedding, which will attract a huge global television audience. But this morning St James’s Palace unveiled plans to make the day a huge interactive event - and the first Royal wedding with a Twitter hashtag #rw2011.
...quoth the BBC's Rory Cellan-Jones.

A host of social media initiatives around the wedding went live yesterday.

We have sure come along way from launching the Monarchy on Twitter in 2009 - see Icons passim.

I am off to the April Facebook Developer Garage meeting tonight. I could live without it to be honest, thinking about how much better off I will be if I put in the last ten years of my life at some legitimate dodge, instead of hop-scotching from one end of the country to the other telling the tale.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Siberian shamanism

From I've just offended Jews, Catholics, women, Arab-Americans, and the entire gay and lesbian community. Who should I call?

Group offended: Catholics
Sample offense: When a woman emailed Wal-Mart in 2005 to complain that the phrase "Happy Holidays" had replaced "Merry Christmas," a customer-service representative responded, in part, that Christmas "is an ancient tradition that has its roots in Siberian shamanism." Catholic League president Bill Donohue announced a boycott of the discount chain.
Sample apology: Wal-Mart fired the customer-service rep, apologized for offending Christians, and changed its website so that the search term "Christmas" was not rerouted to "Holidays." Donohue called off the dogs.
How to apologize: Call the Catholic League at 212-371-3191.
What to say: Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year.
Chuckles notwithstanding, it is getting harder and harder to be whimsical in gay pub snogging, palm cross banning, headscarf death threat Blighty.

(The heroically inclusive and multicultural Blighty is a slang term for Britain, deriving from the Hindustani word vilāyatī (विलायती) (pronounced bilāti in many Indian dialects and languages), from Persian vilayet and ultimately from Arabic wilayah, originally meaning something like "province".)

Lighten up, already.

Monday, April 18, 2011

These are dark times ...



I watched the new Harry Potter movie on DVD with Ben, and thought it was actually rather good.

I have no idea why Bill Nighy decided that Rufus Scrimgeour was Welsh, but I approve.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

All Greek to me



I went to see Afghanistan: Crossroads of the Ancient World in the British Museum yesterday and bought a fridge magnet.

Musing on the Greek influence and looking at a small statue of Heracles that had been discovered there I started - as one does - telling the Burglar how as Buddhism expanded in Central Asia, and fused with Hellenistic influences into Greco-Buddhism, Hercules was adopted to represent the Vajrapani bodhisattva, so that there is a sense in which he may be said to be the patron saint of the Shaolin monastery.

He countered by telling me that some people think that the club wielding Cerne Abbas giant is a representation of Hercules as well.

It is a long way from China to just outside Dorchester whether you go via Greece and Afghanistan or not.

Saturday, April 16, 2011

The House of Love

Telegraph:
The countdown to the royal wedding began in earnest today when Kate Middleton and Prince Harry attended a rehearsal at Westminster Abbey exactly a fortnight before the big day.

Friday, April 15, 2011

Non, je ne regrette rien

Prof. Yishay Mansour of Tel Aviv University's Blavatnik School of Computer Science launched his new project at the International Conference on Learning Theory in Haifa, Israel, earlier this year. His research will help computers minimize what Prof. Mansour calls "regret." Google recently announced that it will fund Tel Aviv University computer scientists and economists to develop this foundational research, a nexus on the cutting edge of computer science and game theory.

"If the servers and routing systems of the Internet could see and evaluate all the relevant variables in advance, they could more efficiently prioritize server resource requests, load documents and route visitors to an Internet site, for instance," Prof. Mansour says — an efficiency that Google finds very attractive.

Of course computers can't "feel" regret — but they can measure the distance between a desired outcome and the actual outcome. Prof. Mansour recently developed an algorithm based on machine learning, or "artificial intelligence," to minimize the amount of virtual regret a computer program might experience.
It's as if Charlie Suet and Dr Strabismus collaborated on an idea.

Tel Aviv, Schmel Aviv; imagine what Jesuit pedagogy could do to a could do here. We'd have network cards that were wracked with guilt over dropping a packet and virtual servers that felt like frauds.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

I write the songs

Barry Manilow has a series on Radio 2 at the moment profiling the people who wrote the Great American Songbook.

I listened to an episode on Leonard Bernstein on the IPlayer in the garden last night. It was great to hear the enthusiasm of a practitioner and a fan for change instead of the condescension of a critic. Is there any more absurd a profession than that of criticism?

I wonder if Barry could explain the great Diabolus in Musica controversy? (see Icons Passim.) Listening to him discourse on Bernstein's expert use of dissonance, I think he probably could.

It's disappointing that I missed the earlier episodes and that there isn't a series catch up option.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

The Polecats

The Polecats are playing the West Dean Festival in August.

I find this scarcely credible. They were formed in 1977, and I remember them delivering their idiosyncratic rockabilly stylings live in concert at Swansea University when I was there.

At the end of a badly received set, some roadie or other rushed onto the stage and demanded "do you want to hear another one?" to the complete indifference of the sullen crowd, and then - as God is my judge - yelled "you'll have to shout louder than that!" into the echoing silence.

The band then returned to impose an encore on a rapidly emptying hall. It is one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

The next morning I saw them in the refectory, they had been forced to stay overnight as departing music critics had pulled the windscreen wipers off their tour bus.

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

The Big Whimper

Britain's Government-appointed banking commission has unveiled the most radical shake-up of industry regulation in a generation in an attempt to make banks safer and better value for consumers.
You probably can't see it from this angle but I've actually got an MBA, with a particular focus on International Finance, from what was then the City University Business School. I believe that my research on Delayed Cash and Carry Arbitrage Opportunities on the New York Mercantile Exchange is still occasionally prescribed to insomniacs by GPs.

I was actually in harness 0n 27 October 1986, the the London Stock Exchange's rules changed in what was known as "Big Bang Day" because of the increase in market activity expected from an aggregation of measures designed to precipitate a complete alteration in the structure of the market.

Without labouring the point the destruction of the distinction between retail and investment banks on that day is, in essence what Sir John Vickers is blaming for a lot of 2008's fiascoes and proposing to reverse. Why doesn't anyone talk about this?

For myself; the root of the problem is massive institutions playing the markets as principals. Back in the day, if lowly capitalized merchant banks burnt their fingers doing that they were the ones getting hurt. When Lloyds did it with your granny's life savings the fallout went further.

I could write more about this but I am losing the will to live. Regulatory frameworks are tedious beyond belief.

Prodnose: If we had a wartime consigliere, a Sicilian, we wouldn't be in this shape?

Myself: It's a simplification, but yes. "Who's watching the store?" is the question to ask.