Scarcely two months on from raising the issue (Icons passim) I think I may have got to the bottom of finding a fitted sheet that will be snug with my mattress.
It turns out it is a 140cm x 200cm Euro/IKEA Size double; bigger than a UK double but smaller than a UK King size. How often have I said to you that when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth? Amazon Prime can take the strain: IKEA DVALA - Fitted sheet, white - 140x200 cm.
For completeness, the bed in Ben's room is a UK small double (120 x 190 cm).
Prodnose: God knows there has been some competition here lately, but that is almost certainly the most boring thing you have ever shared.
Myself: I am not sure. I was only saying to Brad, Angelina, George and Amal the other day that people only see the impossible glamour that is the surface of our lives. Sometimes I think it is good to let a little light in and allow the public to appreciate the hard work that goes on behind the scenes keeping the show on the road.
Angelina (about the new curtains): If you don't like them we can take them back.
Brad: All right, I don't like them.
Angelina: [pause] You'll get used to them.