Wednesday, September 07, 2011

the kiss did not result in any formal action

Am I the only one who finds the sex claims and the 'wild ways' of Microsoft bosses rather endearingly staid? "Miss Redmond denied the short-skirt allegation although Ms Chughtai confirmed Mr Negus asked her to flutter her eyelashes." The horror, the horror.

Mr. Justice Cocklecarrot said “As it seems quite impossible to conduct in a normal manner any case in which these little gentlemen are involved, I suppose I may as well make a kind of summing-up. If the jury think that Mr. Rincewind was pushed from the ladder, they will consider his claim for damages reasonable. If, however, they are satisfied that he was not pushed but fell, as it were, of his own volition, their duty is clear. One thing that has struck me as odd about the case – apart from the interludes of lunacy which we have all deplored – is the fact that Miss Milton awaited the marauder, calmly allowing the ladder to be laid against her, as though she were a wall. She must have heard the approaching steps of this little bravo, and descried his face as it was advanced menacingly towards the goal of his unlawful whim – I refer to the perilously beautiful ear of the defendant. Now, Mrs. Webcross has assured us that ladder-gallantry is not part of the everyday life at her boarding establishment, yet Miss Milton expressed no surprise when she felt the ladder against her body, nor when she saw this little gentleman’s moon-face gazing up to her. I am puzzled; and I am bound to add that the two learned counsel have merely confused the issue by their prodigious display of idiocy and incompetence. I will end on that note. It is for the jury to make what they can of all this nonsense.”
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